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Piss Issue 58

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Published in 
Piss
 · 26 Apr 2019

  

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
- P.I.S.S. Philez Number 58 =
= -
- Molest The Christians! =
= -
- by FreeRadical =
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Well, the Gibisonites that wrote the TORGverse into brief existence weren't the
foretellers they probably imagined they were. There never was a cyberchurch in
cyberspace. Well. Then again I don't know. It's possible that on some server
somewhere, deep in the net, that virtual congregations gather and hold text-
based masses. They all sing and recite, hundreds hooked into the same huge chat
session, some mighty old VAX resounding with the ascii echoes of a thousand
scrolling hosannas. Who knows? There's more ludicrous things.
Everything I've seen suggests that real-time religion is no more than people who
are so bored at work or nite-lifeless that the only way they feel alive is if
they're hooked into IRC's Unitarian lobby. These are like IRC versions of those
pot-luck after sermon gatherings except without the casserole. When VMRL takes
over in the lala future where there are microtitian processors and infinite
aceses rates and terabyte storage fits in your pocket maybe then somebody'll
erect a digital cathedral. This theological pioneer would certainty attract a
congregation as the IRC God-jockeys and the PTL CRT-thumpers are proof that
large groups of people can guilt themselves into anything.
Do I sound self-righteous or what? I get the feeling these people imagine that
they're patronizing Satan when they talk to me. It's really kind of sad. Funny
at the time though.

From #Jesus_Loves_you
1:30 pm. April 24, 1998


<PinkEagle`> oh gosh
<idunno> So everyone who sees this lets pray for that guy!!!!
<idunno> Carl Collier!
<idunno> know him?
<PinkEagle`> well alot of people on here will pull your leg too
<DoctorNIL> Ahhh you all are the simpiest bunch on christians I've ever seen!!!
<PinkEagle`> hmm no i sure dont
<PinkEagle`> havent heard of him
<idunno> hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
<idunno> bumer
<PinkEagle`> i have been to lotsa churchs round there
<DoctorNIL> All "pray for him" and "pray for her"
<PinkEagle`> simpiest?
<idunno> yeah
<DoctorNIL> Weak willed
<DoctorNIL> wishishy waSHY
<idunno> thats what were supposed to do
<DoctorNIL> No way.
<idunno> as a matter of fact I'm praying for you! :0)
<DoctorNIL> Youre supposed to be swinging a sword for your savior!
<PinkEagle`> were not going to take this into an argument
so if that is how u feel bout it well then that
is your opinion
<PinkEagle`> and your entitled too it
<DoctorNIL> Well your'e not entitled to yours.
<idunno> uh hu
<DoctorNIL> Jesus'd be nailing you losers up right now!
<PinkEagle`> so what brings u to jlu Dr?
<idunno> Dear Father,
<idunno> In the name of Jesus Christ,
<DoctorNIL> Didn't you ever listen to Onward Christian Soldiers?
<idunno> I come to you praying for this person now
<PinkEagle`> yes father
<idunno> I pray that you would open his eyes Lord
<PinkEagle`> and we give u all the honor and all the glory and
all the praise
<idunno> and show him that
<DoctorNIL> I'LL DO WHAT I CAN, MY SON.
<idunno> you came not to cause
<DoctorNIL> show him what my son
<DoctorNIL> ?
<idunno> envy hatred
<idunno> wars or strife
<DoctorNIL> BUT I DID MY SON!
<idunno> but you came to bring peace
<PinkEagle`> yes lord
<idunno> to all of those who believe
<idunno> you said ask and you shall receive
<DoctorNIL> STOP PUTTING WORDS INTO YOUR FATHER'S MOUTH!!!
<idunno> whatsoever you bind on earth shall be bound in Heaven
<idunno> so now Lord we claim victory in this prayer
<PinkEagle`> yes lord
<DoctorNIL> SON,
<PinkEagle`> thank u jesus
<PinkEagle`> praise u father god!!!
<DoctorNIL> MIRACLES ARE NOT WROUGHT BY ANNOYANCE ALONE
<idunno> That you rebuke Satan out of him right now
<idunno> and let your peace that surpasseth all
<idunno> understanding flood his soul
<DoctorNIL> WHIP THE DEMONS!! OH YESSSS!
PinkEagle` sings blessed be the name of the lord blessed be the name of
the lord blessed be the name of the lord most high
<idunno> In Jesus' Name, AMEN
<PinkEagle`> amen thank u lord
<DoctorNIL> AHHHHHHHHHH
<DoctorNIL> MENNNNNNNNNN
<DoctorNIL> !!!!!!!!!!!
<PinkEagle`> praise the lord
<DoctorNIL> Thank you.
<idunno> Your welcome
<idunno> HALLELUJAH
<DoctorNIL> Was that as good for me as it was for you?
<idunno> better for you my friend
<PinkEagle`> someday u will know just how good it was for u
<idunno> :0)
<PinkEagle`> u might not know it now but one day u will :)
<idunno> AMEN
<idunno> you will be saved!
<idunno> I have claimed it friend
<idunno> me and pink
<PinkEagle`> :)
<idunno> whatsoever two or three agree upon
<idunno> it shall be done
<idunno> AMEN
<PinkEagle`>
<idunno> i have to go and get back to work how long
u been on irc?
<idunno> HALLELUJAH
<PinkEagle`> yes amen!!!
<DoctorNIL> jeSUS cHRIST


This is my tete-a-tete with Mik the Christian. I met him on Praise_His_Name or
somesuch channel. I was wondering aloud if someone would help me blow-up a
nonexistent abortion-clinic when he msg'd me. What a hot topic I had used to
bait my hook! Mik tired to be a good sport about being had, kind of like a
tourist that smiles about being took by the card sharp but the tourist is
usually good natured because the man behind the card table might have a knife in
his coat.
Mik was just stupid. I got him pretty worked up by the end because he was
typing too intently to notice that I was breaking my statements into two lines.


Attempting to establish DCC session...
DCC Session established with 208.84.12.72

<mik^^^> whats up
<DoctorNIL> I have ten pounds of plastique if youv'e got detonators.
<mik^^^> come on man...
<DoctorNIL> I'm serious.
<mik^^^> why
<DoctorNIL> Because abortion doctors kill children.
<mik^^^> i know that... talk to me
<mik^^^> whats your background in this?
<DoctorNIL> I heard on tv that the net was a good places to find acomplices for
this sort of thing
<mik^^^> if i may ask
<DoctorNIL> Well. ....
<mik^^^> doc.... its not a good plan,... and its counterproductive
<DoctorNIL> Well what else is there?
<DoctorNIL> Iv'e allready got the stuff.
<mik^^^> prayer... work with the victims
<DoctorNIL> Iv'e talked to god about it.
<mik^^^> how old are you?
<DoctorNIL> 23
<mik^^^> i have too doc
<DoctorNIL> You can't work with dead victims mik.
<mik^^^> ive been thru 10 years of it
<mik^^^> hey... i know where you are coming from... if you are indeed serious
<DoctorNIL> really?
<mik^^^> there is a better way, belive me
<mik^^^> i was in jail for doing a rescue in '88
<DoctorNIL> Oh. Wow.
<DoctorNIL> what was your experience? what led you to change?
<mik^^^> not change....
<mik^^^> adapt
<mik^^^> realize
<DoctorNIL> What did you do to get in jail?
<mik^^^> a rescue
<mik^^^> have you ever done a rescue?
<DoctorNIL> No.
<DoctorNIL> Did you save any babies?
<mik^^^> yea
<DoctorNIL> I don't belive in it.
<mik^^^> but lost more than it gained
<mik^^^> dont believe in what?
<DoctorNIL> rescues
<mik^^^> where you from friend?
<DoctorNIL> WV
<mik^^^> how did you get involved in pro-life
<DoctorNIL> My mom had an abortion.
<DoctorNIL> I lost a sister.
<DoctorNIL> so I killed her
<mik^^^> dont jerk me
<DoctorNIL> I'm not.
<DoctorNIL> Hey the net is safe isn't it?
<mik^^^> you are anon, if thats what you mean
<DoctorNIL> Yeah, ok.
<DoctorNIL> I really don't know how to use this stuff.
<mik^^^> get rid of it
<DoctorNIL> Not the plastique man, the net.
<DoctorNIL> The explosives cost to much for me ever to throw away.
<mik^^^> ok
<mik^^^> man....
<DoctorNIL> are you making fun of me?
<mik^^^> no....
<mik^^^> are you playing with me
<DoctorNIL> no
<DoctorNIL> why would I do that?
<mik^^^> all sorts of fools on the net... just asking
<mik^^^> why do you say you "killed her"?
<mik^^^> talk to me brother
<DoctorNIL> i taken the kaiser blade and hit her upside the head wit' it.
<DoctorNIL> Killed 'er.
<DoctorNIL> I'm not your brother
<mik^^^> youre jackin with me
<DoctorNIL> I would't jack you with ten gallons of KY
<mik^^^> talk to me then
<DoctorNIL> I did. I have been.
<DoctorNIL> My dad wanted me to do it.
<mik^^^> tell me what you mean.... did you kill your mom?
<DoctorNIL> yes
<DoctorNIL> Do you think I'm evil?
<mik^^^> i dont know what to think....
<DoctorNIL> Please don't judge me.
<mik^^^> i dont judge
<DoctorNIL> If you were in my shoes you would've done the same.
<DoctorNIL> I feel bad about it sometimes.
<mik^^^> i dont know your shoes.... that's what I'm asking about
<DoctorNIL> well....Like when I lie awake at night....
<DoctorNIL> It's all I can think about.
<mik^^^> since when...
<DoctorNIL> since two years ago.
<DoctorNIL> That's why I want to bolw up the mahaska county abortion clinic.
<DoctorNIL> I want to make amends
<DoctorNIL> make peace with god.
<DoctorNIL> I just need some help.
<mik^^^> how can i help you
<DoctorNIL> Get me in touch with someone who has timed detonators
<DoctorNIL> or get me a van.
<mik^^^> that is NOT the answer.....
<DoctorNIL> But GOD said it was!!!
<DoctorNIL> he told me damnit!
<mik^^^> doc.... god told me to talk to you and share my experiences.... I'm 47
and been around a while
<DoctorNIL> so?
<mik^^^> so do you have anyone you can share with.... about this
<DoctorNIL> Well no
<DoctorNIL> not really
<DoctorNIL> that's why i'm here with you
<mik^^^> so talk to me
<mik^^^> but dont jerk me
<DoctorNIL> Well. You say it's wrong but doesn't the bible say an eye for an
eye and a tooth for a tooth?
<mik^^^> come on....
<mik^^^> what about the mother...
<DoctorNIL> If a murder is let free by the law isn't it our duty not to suffer
him to live?
<mik^^^> she suffers irreparablely
<DoctorNIL> I'm serious about the bible.
<DoctorNIL> I don't want to take it lightly
<mik^^^> what relious background do you have, my friend?
<mik^^^> are you my friend?
<mik^^^> the reason i ask is...
<DoctorNIL> yes
<mik^^^> ok, maybe i just listen...
<DoctorNIL> no brother. if you have something to say you should say it
<mik^^^> by the way.... im new here... i was just cruising the net,... im not a
crusader or anything
<mik^^^> but i've been thru the abortion debate heavily... almost cost me my
marriage
<DoctorNIL> Oh that sucks.
<mik^^^> right
<DoctorNIL> The bitch didn't want to pop em out for you eh?
<DoctorNIL> So.
<DoctorNIL> Did you kill her?
<DoctorNIL> heh heh
<mik^^^> nope, she is my wife... she just has a different perspective
<mik^^^> thats not funny, man
<DoctorNIL> don't play me man!!
<mik^^^> you know what i think...?
<DoctorNIL> I know what I'd do if my wife din't want to carry my child!!!
<mik^^^> hello... did i say she didnt want to carry my child?
<mik^^^> i said she had a different perspective.... grow up
<DoctorNIL> well no but I can read between the lines.
<mik^^^> well you misread....
<DoctorNIL> Oh.
<mik^^^> if you want to talk serious... im here.... if you want to bullshit....
i have things to do
<DoctorNIL> I am serious.
<DoctorNIL> Can you help me?
<mik^^^> maybe
<DoctorNIL> can you put me in touch with operation rescue?
<mik^^^> but you gotta cut the crap
<DoctorNIL> If they do black ops I'm thier man!
<mik^^^> i can put you in touch with rachel
<DoctorNIL> Like the jew?
<mik^^^> Project Rachel
<mik^^^> yep
<DoctorNIL> Hmmm.
<mik^^^> you really wanna save babies?
<DoctorNIL> Doesn't the bible say thou shalt not suffer a jew to live?
<DoctorNIL> Yes. but not if theyr'e jew babies
<mik^^^> it starts way before the clinic
<DoctorNIL> I can clean an AK as well as any man!
<mik^^^> ok, first forget the dynamite, focus on helping and loving.... God is
Love, after all. right?
<DoctorNIL> No.
<DoctorNIL> My Lord is satan
<mik^^^> then you missed the point
<mik^^^> then you are bullshiting me and I dont have time for you
<DoctorNIL> Oh como'n we havent even gotten to the sex yet
<DoctorNIL> Do you take it from behind?
<mik^^^> why dont you get a real life?
<DoctorNIL> I can't
<mik^^^> why not?
<DoctorNIL> It's too late for me now
<mik^^^> im crying
<DoctorNIL> but you can save yourself!
<mik^^^> i offered to help, but you shove it at me... so what can i do?
<DoctorNIL> Hey.
<DoctorNIL> Anybody ever tell you how stupid you are?
<mik^^^> im not an evangilist, i just care about ppl... excuse me
<DoctorNIL> maybe people don't care about you
<DoctorNIL> I don't.
<mik^^^> my son went down that road... now he's in a 12 step program and is
finally coming out of his
stupor
<mik^^^> are you really a tool of satan? hehe
<DoctorNIL> My dad tried to put me in one of those but I killed him too
<DoctorNIL> Oh yeah!
<DoctorNIL> He showed me the beauty of the flame!!!
<mik^^^> why are you on this channel then?
<DoctorNIL> Because I'm looking for ripe souls among the faithfull.
<mik^^^> are you looking for a challenge?
<DoctorNIL> No.
<DoctorNIL> Actually I'm in a slump
<mik^^^> awww. sorry :)
<DoctorNIL> Christians are the easiest
<mik^^^> well... is that fun?
<mik^^^> hahaha
<DoctorNIL> Well, I like it when I can get the kiddy rapers...
<mik^^^> you are pathetic... but i smile anyways
<DoctorNIL> Your'e still talking to me faggot.
<mik^^^> hopefully you are gonna grow up some day
<mik^^^> btw, im not a faggot
<DoctorNIL> Would you like to be?
<mik^^^> no.. thank you :)
<DoctorNIL> I have a ten inch cock for your ass!
<mik^^^> your'e funny :)
<DoctorNIL> btw your'e pathetic....
<mik^^^> not only an idiot but a liar
<mik^^^> hey... you might want to think about getting a life.... later fool!
DCC Session Closed

So mik left me.

This shit gets kinda boring after awhile, at least Alec_Empire empire says so.
Me, I never tire of baiting Christians. Some'll kick you like a vicious
Chihuahua, others'll pretend they don't hear you. Maybe I'm sick. Maybe I
really am Satan. I keep asking people if they think I HE and they keep telling
me "no". I guess disguise is one of Satan's greatest virtues.

That's It for this file. If I save any more Christian-baiting IRC logs I'll
circulate them around.

----------------------------------------------------------------------
PISS - People into Serious Shit

Founders - Defenestrator, PhrostByte
Members -
Author Parselon
Wu Forever
kQs
Extinction
Grench
Rhodekyll
Dial Tone
Psycho Phreak
Djdude
Circular Reclusion
Havok Luther
AT2Screech
Phantom Operator
Apocalypse
Skrike
Kalony
FreeRadical

Contributors-
Sameer Ketkar
The Axess Phreak
Devnull

PISS, the author, and anyone else does not take responsibility for what
you do with the stuff contained in this file. If you get busted,
don't cry to us. We don't care. We have never done any of this.
Really. And we don't condone it. Uh-huh.

Want more stuff? Go to http://piss.hypermart.net

E-mail the group at piss@softhome.net

© Copyright 1998 PISS Publications and also copyrighted by the author.
This file may be posted freely as long as this notice stays on the end.
All rights reserved. Or something like that.

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