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Turbo Zine Issue 1

eZine's profile picture
Published in 
Turbo Zine
 · 26 Apr 2019

  



x... turbo 'zine - issue numba one ...x


x . ---[intro]------------------------------------------------------------- . x

sup everyone? this is turbo emag. i know how to code snuff, but didn't
feel like it coding one for this, cuz i really like how misfit did the
p0rk 'zine. i'm gonna cum out wit another zine just for everyone, with
is currently being coded by me and sumother guy in the PA area.

anywayz, this 'zine will prolly start out like p0rk. i'll let ya know
a few thangs bout me before i babble on more and more and more.

i've been in da scene for a while. i was in the 602 fire group, then
pixel, vor, cia, thrust. then didn't get included in the merge, cuz
they thought i ripped some ascii shit. if they wanna think that, then
that is good for them, but i'll swear on da holy bible that i didn't
rip anything they said that i did. and thats that, end of that story.


x . ---[p0rk!]------------------------------------------------------------- . x

i really like how misfit put the last p0rk zine together. like it was
hard. you just right about non-sense and people like us, will prolly
like that snuff. well, i liked the story of your day. it kicked.
might do one of those these days. but, my life is pretty much like his.
hit the damn sleeper button a couple times. wake up 25 mins later.
take a shower, get dressed, go to bus stop in the cold, even tho i
live in arizona, were i don't get that cold, and then go to school.


x . ---[my music]---------------------------------------------------------- . x

i listen to many types of music. that is prolly the only form of
entertainment that i really use. i watch tv sumtimes, but that
gets borning. speaking of tv, does anyone watch wrestling on tnt or
tbs. i saw sting wrestle hulk hogan and the dungeon of doom came in
a broke things up. then hulk and sting smashed a chair on the gaint
(the song of andre the giant). yeah, i know that snuff is fake, but
hey, it gives me sumthing to watch, that i like.

back to the music. here are some bands and singers i listen too:
boyz II men, bon jovi, white zombie, korn, 3t, janet jackson,
mariah carey, babyface, jon b., anything on the radio, shania
twain (only country artist i listen too), areosmith, bush, civ, and
much much much more. i really like everythang, 'cept for country
and most rap.


x . ---[skool]------------------------------------------------------------- . x

why does skool suck so much? actualy, my day at scholl only suckz when
teachers give you lots of work (espically on weekends). i usualy, enjoy
school. i know that sounds sick. but, i go around strutting thinking
i'm god, cuz thatz who i am (simple as that). but, i check out all
the fine girlz. smile and they go crazy. cuz i'm god. but, the best
part is when that bell rings and its either time to go eat lunch or its
time to go home.


x . ---[people]------------------------------------------------------------ . x

why do people act like jerkz? it just bugs me. some of my friends do it.
it just pisses me off.


x . ---[unabomber]--------------------------------------------------------- . x

just was thinking of sumthang to write and thought about the unabomer.
which has not been caught by the feds (FBI) for 17 years. i would like
to say right now is that 'mr. unabomber, where ever you are. you're
simply the best bomber alive.' that was kewl. anywayz, if you have
any more info about this guy. like if you find out any stuff about him
from a newzpaper or even from a faq then send me email. i will list
the address at the end of this 'zine. right now i have his manifesto.

also, if anyone sends me info about this guy that i dont already have.
then you will be thanked and i will credit a FREE turbo issue to your
account. <g>


x . ---[bombs]------------------------------------------------------------- . x

how to make a fertilizer bomb...

ingredients are as followz:
-x- Newzpaper
-x- Fertilizer (any with ammonia nitrate in it, or a chemical kind)
-x- Cotton
-x- Diesel fuel

make a pouch out of the newspaper and put some fertilizer in it.
put cotton on da top. soak da cotton wit da fuel. then light &
run like a mutha fuqr! this blowz up about 500 square ft.

or instead of using the newzpaper, just put in a welded sqaure or
round metal box. and follow the same steps. this is the same bomb
that timothy mcveigh used and left to blow the fuk out of oklahoma
city federal building. good places to try this would be yer skool,
federal building, mail office, yer enemies house, or jus any place
that you feel like.


x . ---[6o2 syspimp of da month]------------------------------------------- . x

this award will have to go to trip the syspimp of illegal immagrents.
your board kicks, but some of yer userz are lamers. anywayz, yer alwayz
there for me and get some of the new filez, even if i do like them or
not.


x . ---[money]------------------------------------------------------------- . x

money is what rulez are society and world. if it wasn't for money. you
woould get everything free. now that doesn't that bad, but people are
greed bastards and want to be better than everyone else.

sometimes i wonder if you can buy these things:

-x- friends
-x- love
-x- erasers
-x- sex
-x- monkey balls
-x- bodyguards

that was stupid. anywayz, if you are always trying to make a few extra
buckz. here are some helpful tips to try. if you are a teen like me and
your mom or dad give you lunch money everyday, try to save it. or say
the prices went up like a buck. believe me alot of parents are stupid.
then save theat money and go to school and beg for money and make up
some story that yer parents aren't given you money anymore. try not to
spend that money. like me, you will end up getting a bunch of ones
everyday and then you will have a big wad. sometimes, girls dig that, if
they see flipping threw alot of ones.

or you could sell drugz, if ya wont to. but i don't. cuz i ain't about
to get caught or nuttin like that.

or if you have a friend that is big dick, steal his money.

also a bunch of teacherz are real stupid at my school. they leave class
to go to the bathroom before, durin', or after class. then is the perfect
time to snag some of there money that you should be gettin. cuz we all
put up wit the teacherz these dayz. they wont know what hit them. dont
make a habit out this one, cuz soon they will catch on.

another stealing money tip. just take the smallest billz possible, unless
they have like phiv or more of the same bill. believe this snuff workz.
try it and you will soon see how rich you may be.

alwayz, try to store away some of this hard earned job. cuz remember,
stealing is the most profitable job out there, unless you get caught.


x . ---[ya coderz out there]----------------------------------------------- . x

here is some source for you turbo pascal coderz out there. it is to turn
on and off the cursor. it can be helpful for sum programz.

procedure cursorOn;assembler;asm
mov ah,3; mov bh,0; int $10; and ch,not $20; mov ah,1; int $10;
end;

procedure cursorOff;assembler;asm
mov ah,3; mov bh,0; int $10; or ch,$20; mov ah,1; int $10;
end;


x . ---[web sitez to visit]------------------------------------------------ . x

here are some web sitez to visit:

-x- http://groove.ufl.edu/~hpl4096
-x- http://www.sex.com
-x- http://www.hotsex.com
-x- http://www.erotica.com
-x- http://www.erie.net/~gnome/.
-x- http://www.casino.net
-x- http://www.primenet.com/~dbs/tat/tiffani.html
-x- http://www.pantless.com/xarchives
-x- http://www.prysm.com/~cosoft

thatz about it. try those and maybe next issue i will have a few more
of them to share with ya. surprise! surprise! i do share. <g>


x . ---[credit cards]------------------------------------------------------ . x

here are a few Bank Of America credit card numba's:

-x- 4024 047 285 347
-x- 4024 817 874 577
-x- 4024 448 886 709
-x- 4024 096 803 511

here are a few CitiBank credit card numba's:

-x- 4128 845 577 282
-x- 4128 763 272 221
-x- 4128 515 894 009

here are a few First Interstate credit card numba's:

-x- 5412 7079 6436 7719
-x- 5412 7089 0497 9563
-x- 5412 7071 5564 9271
-x- 5412 7097 6392 4690


x . ---[closing]----------------------------------------------------------- . x

well, it was all great. don't have no distros yet. might get on the net
tonight and see if anyone wants to be a distro.

anywayz, time to close this issue up. i hope i decide to write again.
maybe tomorrow if my friends aint around until the night time.

oh yeah, my email address is: soul.raider@blast.neta.com

and i want to here from you.

if you want to write for the mag or do cute little ascii pics for it,
then like email and i will get back to ya. or you can find me on irc
in #ansi and any #warez channel under the nick of _bh_, bhurt, bh.

later and i hope you enjoyed this issue. maybe, i could have nasty
stories about picking your nose or butt. heheh. l8z.

-.x.- big hurt -.x.-
-.x.-in da house -.x.-

x . ----------------------------------------------------------------------- . x

x... turbo 'zine - issue numba one ...x

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