Pork Issue 06

eZine lover (@eZine)

Published in 

Pork

 · 15 Aug 2019

 

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      €€€     ‹€€€€≤≤€±±fl∞ ‹    ˛  fl€€fl€€‹   €€€€    €≤≤±€€€€€› fl ‹‹flflfl 
      €€€  ˛ flflflflfl∞±      fi› ‹fl     fi€€€ €›  €€€€   flflfl±flflflflfl   ‹€€   fl€€€≤€‹‹ 
     fi€€€          ∞      fi€fl        €€€€€€  €≤€€      ∞       fl€≤€›    €€€€€fl€‹˛    €≤€€                ‹fl         fi€€€€€›∞ €±≤€              fi€±≤€    €€€€€€ € ‹‹‹€≤±≤›              ˛   fl‹      ‹€≤≤±±fl ±fl≤∞±               fl≤∞±fl    fi€€€€€€€  flfl€±∞±€‹  ‹                fl˛ ‹‹flflfl±fl    ∞ ± ∞                ± ∞     fi€€≤€€€€ti!  ∞ ∞      ˛                      ∞       ∞                         ‹€€€≤≤€±±                                   ˛                          ˛      flflflflflfl±flflfl€                               fl         pOrk #000,000,006        fl        ∞   fi                            €                                        € 

                          ±           "Anti-Semetist Munkees,          ± 
∞∞∞∞∞ ∞∞∞∞  ∞  ∞∞∞∞ ∞    ∞≤±∞    And the Doodleboys who love them"   ∞±≤∞ ∞∞∞ ∞∞                              €                                    € 
                                  ‹                            ‹ 
                                           ˛          ˛ 

 
-- ( pOrk #6 intro ) ----------------------------------------------------------- 
 no. i am not going to talk about jew-hating monkeys. Nor their sex slaves. But 
 those  titles-that-have-nothing-to-do-with-the-zine  are pretty popular, so  i 
 decided to jump on the bagwagon. w00w00! you know you ph34r. 

 ok.. here comes something cool. <drum roll> 

-- ( pOrk #6 definition of the month ) ----------------------------------------- 
 for˙nix (fìr'niks) n., pl. for'ni˙ces (-nÇ sêz') [ModL. < L., 
 an arch] any of several anatomic arches or folds, such as 
 the vault of the pharynx or the upper part of the vagina 

 <Taken from _Webster's NewWorld Dictionary_, Second College Edition, (c)1980> 

 fornix : area between mouth and throat, or pussy lips 

 <Taken from _Trip's Oldschool Dictionary_, First Doodleboy Edition, (c)1995 > 

-- ( pOrk #6 ascii section ) --------------------------------------------------- 
 y0h0h0.  Here's my unbiased  (well, almost, sometimes  Satan tells me  what to 
 choose) choices for top ascii pic for the month of 1195, and top 5 fonts. 

-- ( screw that ) ------------------------------------------------------------- 

 only ascii packs that came out were wicked and trank. maybe next time. 

-- ( sometimes i like to think i can fly ) ------------------------------------ 

 me too. 

-- ( why are you talking to the headers!? ) ----------------------------------- 

i have no clue. its the in thing to do these days. 

-- ( neeto skeeto top ten type thing ) ---------------------------------------- 

   Top 10 Reasons Why My Life Sucks <listed in reverse order for suspense> 

      10. I sit around listening to vinyl all day. They went out in the 70s. 
       9. I wrestle. Its a common known fact that all jocks are evil mockerys 
          of all that is good and fuzzy. hate me. 
       8. I'm listening to vinyl RIGHT NOW. 
       7. Because I'm doing a top 10. top 10's are dumb. 
       6. I have a Marilyn Manson patch stapled to my forehead. I'm obviously 
          obsessed with a group full of sinners and child molesters. What kind 
          of gawd-ph34ring d00dl3b0y am i?! 
       5. Not only is it vinyl, its a Sub Pop collection. oooooooh. 
       4. I did the line noise in here by hand. Really. I swear. Whatta life. 
       3. That vinyl joke got old around #8. 
       2. I sometimes like to pretend i am the munkee king, and dance wildly. 
       1. 3y3 dr4w 4ns1!@@#E$%&#^*& ph34r m3@!#@$#$ PH34R M3!@@#$%& 

-- ( that was pretty dumb Trip ) ---------------------------------------------- 

 but it gets me chicks. 

 waitaminute. i'm not talking to dividers any more. 

-- ( line noise, serving no purpose other than taking up space ) -------------- 

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-- ( w00! that was spiff trip ) ----------------------------------------------- 

thanks.  that took me about a week to type out with the # pad, so you better 
like it. First person to tell me what part of my anotomy is mentioned in there 
gets a free ascii. 

-- ( how do i tell you i found it?! yer out in the boonfucks of arizona. ) ---- 

by vmb, of course. oh, i wanna point something out. that vmb misfit is so fond 
of calling his, it's OURS. actually, its the apathy vmb. but we're the seniors, 
so its OURS. capiche? i can't find the slip of paper i have with the #, so just 
read pork 1-5, its in there somewhere. 

-- ( what ya listenin to trip? ) ---------------------------------------------- 

<switching to a different record> 

Mudhoney, on vinyl. My record player kicks all sorts of ass. It was my moms 
when she was just a wee lass. Now its mine. Its a manual, i have to set the 
needle myself. But it rocks. Vinyl sounds better than any other. cd, tape, 8- 
track.. anything. vinyl kicks all of their ass. 

-- ( ok, thats it trip. i'm sick of you. go away. ) --------------------------- 

 k. hopefully, SOMEONE liked this. if not, well, screw you. eventually, every 
 one will ph34r me. by the year 2000, i will be the US embassador to China. So 
 there. 

-- ( th th the thats all, folks ) --------------------------------------------- 

 
  guys who do shit for pOrk : 

                    misfit                 the big cheese 
<listed in          cypherhex           not so big cheese 
reverse order       scribble            not so big cheese 
of leetness :>      trip                not so big cheese 

-- (distros? )----------------------------------------------------------------- 

                  board :                  zyzop guy: 

                    alderaan                 mindcrime 
                    avalon                   belial 
                    birdhouse projekts       devine styler 
                    erebus                   hooch 
                    evil intentions          betrayer 
                    illegal immigrants       trip 
SAUCE00its pOrk baby. whack off to it.    pOrk people         19951119#!
P£