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Anada 157
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. a n a d a 1 5 7 0 9 - 1 2 - 0 0
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. . . . . . . . . . . "Jason on
. . . . . . . . . . Vampires, Oral Sex, and Menstruation"
. . . . . . . . . .
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . by Jason
. . w w w . a n a d a . n e t . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
All throughout history, many great discoveries and inventions have
involved the combinations of pre-existing concepts or inventions or other
stuff, thus pushing humanity farther ahead into the future. For example,
paper and ink, peanut butter and chocolate, the clock and the radio.
Don't ask how this light of creativity was turned on in the
convoluted mass of my mighty brain. Suffice to say, someone at work was
complaining that she was anemic. I asked why, fishing for the answer I knew
was true. She finally intimated that she was on the rag. That part, at
least made sense. The rest sort of just fell into place without any
meaningful stimuli.
Enough background. I feel that I have finally uncovered the secret
that explains the macabre fascination with vampires, among chicks, anyway.
It also explains why vampires, even female ones, appear to be particularly
interested in chicks.
The way I see it, the onset of menstruation, while a sexual turn-off
for most mortals, would be a godsend for both a vampire and the mentruatee.
The vampire would just go to town while the chick just enjoys it. What a
symbiotic relationship that would be.
Since I doubt that female vampires menstruate, being dead and all,
vampires can only get this feast from living chicks. So if vampires ever
took over, they'd have to leave some live chicks around. AND, since
vampires are immortal and most chicks aren't, they would need to keep a few
guys around to keep the babies coming so that they can keep their oral
lovefest going.
Therefore, if vampires took over, we probably wouldn't notice much
difference, except that women will get all the oral sex they could possibly
want, and men would be happy not having to give it. Vampires would be
happy, too, I guess.
I can't help it. I just think about these things. It's the price of
genius.
. . w w w . a n a d a . n e t . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
. anada 157 by Jason (c)2000 anada e'zine .
. . w w w . a n a d a . n e t . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
