Getting Even

ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ» º ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ º º ³ MILITARY ³ º º ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ º ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍͼ The canard that began World War II in Europe was based on the tenets of dirty trickery. On 1 September 1939, a group of what appeared to be Polish soldiers attacked a German radio station near the two countries' borders. In "self-defense," German units then fired upon Polish units in Danzig. That stunt actually started World War II. The so-called aggressors who attacked the German radio station were actually inmates from German concentr...

ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ» º ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ º º ³ MAIL ³ º º ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ º ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍͼ The Ku Klux Klan has some interesting strategies for spreading terror. One of these is to collect from regional newspapers clippings of unsolved arsons (or robberies, rapes, burglaries, assaults, etc.). If you need to fatten the file, include clips from national publications too. Place the clips in a manila envelope and tape it to an old gasoline can (or ax, bra, shotgun shell, jimmy bar, etc.), which you leave on your mark's home or office doorste...

ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ» º ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ º º ³ JOGGERS ³ º º ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ º ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍͼ Overweight and overwrought motorists drive by in their Detroit Dinosaurs, pass a jogger, and mutter, "Damn stupid schmuck." It's the human way to hate what and whom you don't understand. Joggers are often thought of as nuts, oddballs, and kooks to be dealt with. Marty Jones, a landowner, is more specific, saying, "They run across a corner of my property, using a path I put in for my own use. I posted the land, but they ignored the postings...

ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ» º ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ º º ³ HOTELS ³ º º ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ º ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍͼ Suppose you are staying at a hotel and get into a bad beef over the poor quality of the meal you get in their restaurant. After trying to be reasonable, here is how Ralph Charell, a champion-class advocate for the little guy, handled it. Seeing absolutely no satisfaction and no end of snobbish treatment, Charell took the following steps. He requested a deposit box in the hotel safe and placed the offending rib roast, which he felt was of poor...

ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ» º ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ º º ³ FILLERS ³ º º ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ º ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍͼ Trickster Aynesworth Belin is thrilled with the recent introduction of the super-foam products. These are urethane-and-resin compounds, usually in a spray can, which billow out and expand into a mass at least thirty times the original volume. They harden quickly, often within five minutes. Another version is a two-part liquid that when mixed does even more astounding things. One quart will give you the equal of 150 pounds of plaster. A gal...

ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ» º ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ º º ³ CLERGY ³ º º ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ º ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍͼ One of the most useful bits of armament in the trickster's arsenal is a set of clerical garb. Lenny Bruce proved how financially useful this disguise is when he panhandled Miami dressed in a religious costume. But then, organized religion has known this for years, profitably practicing their old proverb "Let us prey." Obtain and make use of overt religious garb. It creates a wonderfully secure and trustworthy image. Drug marketeers often use ...

ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ» º ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ º º ³ CARS ³ º º ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ º ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍͼ This one's really kiddie Halloween time, but it does work. A bunch of old nuts and bolts placed into the wheel well behind the hubcap will make the mark think his/her car is falling apart. It's worth some minor harassment, of course, and works outstandingly well with high-strung nonmechanical typed who absolutely panic at car noises. You can get a little heavier than Halloween by removing a hubcap from your mark's car wheel and loosening or rem...

ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ» º ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ º º ³ ASSASSINATION ³ º º ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ º ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍͼ Suppose you have a mark whose ill temper has created problems for you. Or perhaps this mark is simply an obnoxious nut whose obsessions have cost you personally. A dentist I know spent many unselfish hours working to get flouride into his community's drinking water as a means of fighting tooth decay in children. An apolitical and highly dedicated professional, he was concerned only with healthcare for the kids in the comm...

ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ» º ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ º º ³ ADDITIVIES ³ º º ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ º ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍͼ Harmful additives are a formidable weapon against machinery, people, and processes. Additives perform one or more of the following: 1) Corrosion...sulfuric acid, for example, will corrode the gutter, eaves, and downspout of a home; dumped salt will mar a building surface or floor and kill a lawn. 2) Contamination...copper salts will rot rubber products; soap in a public or corporate fountain will create giant foam. Or put it in a ...