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The Hogs of Entropy 0124
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hoe issue #124
>> "short story (code number ORANGE)" <<
by -> murmur
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"dave, it's sort of dark in here. are you sure we should go on
any farther?"
"good lord, sarah, we're in a CAVE. did you think we were visiting
the lighting fixture section of Menards or something? we're SPELUNKING.
that's what SPELUNKERS do. now come on."
sarah hadn't really wanted to go with dave this particular day. she
was having sort of a bad hair day for one, and for two, well, caves were
kind of dank and dark and dingy and sarah didn't really like things to be
dank and dark and dingy. she was thirsty for a capuccino too. why had she
let him talk her into this?
"sarah, what the hell are you doing? you're not going to trip over
any armadillos in here. this isn't a man-eating cave, for crying out loud.
now come on!"
dave wasn't entirely sure why he'd invited sarah to come with. but
one way or the other he thought the trip might do her some good. she had
settled into a 90s yuppie way of things with her capuccinos, etc., and dave
thought a nice day of spelunking might be good for her. he had never
dreamed she'd act so terrified of rocks though.
"dave, is that a snake? DAVE, THERE'S A SNAKE! KILL IT!"
"sarah, that's the FLOOR. familar with the concept of FLOOR?
perhaps that rare anomalie known as the GROUND? the BOTTOM of the CAVE?
there's no snake there. stop acting so ridiculous. you're supposed to be
having fun, not carrying on like an infant freshly run out of apples and
chicken."
"now how am i supposed to have fun when i can't see more than four
feet in front of me and i don't know what's in this cave and i'm thirsty and
i look like i just got out of a sandstorm and i.."
"hey, sarah? SHUT UP. okay? now you better ENJOY YOURSELF before
i get REALLY PISSED OFF."
sarah had better things to do than go hiking in a big old slab of
rock or whatever a cave was. she could be at the salon or at the mall or
better yet she could be out with some of the girls doing whatever. and she
had real concerns, too. after all, it was thursday, and it was getting
later in the afternoon, and ER would be on later.
"dave, when are we going to turn back? i mean, we're kind of deep
in this here cavern or whatever."
"you want to turn back now? we've hardly gotten anywhere!"
"i don't want to be back late.."
"for ER. i know. bloody doctor shows."
dave checked his watch. it was almost 5 and it would take them
about a half hour to get back to the truck from where they were and another
half hour to drive home and another half hour to eat and she probably had
another stop to make that would take another half hour and then it would be
almost 7 and if she got back after 7 and didn't have all 2 hours to prep for
her stupid show she'd probably go ballistic on him so
"alright, i guess we have gone pretty far after all. let's head
back. and i'm sorry i snapped at you. but for the love of mogel, sarah,
you've really got to get OUT more and away from all of the pomp and
circumstance that you've become accustomed to."
"yeah, you tell me that all the time. oh well, i guess this little
spelunk bit wasn't so bad after all. i'm sorry i've made this such a
difficult thing for you to enjoy."
"oh, that's not the case at all. don't think of it that way. i'm
really glad you came. now let's get headed back."
he kissed her on the cheek and even in the dim light eminating from
their heavy-duty flashlights by their knees he could see her face turn a
rosier hue. he hated ER and he disliked most of her friends. but he loved
her.
she really didn't like the whole cave thing that much. but that was
okay, really. she spent the day with him. that's all that really mattered.
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* (c) HoE publications. HoE #124 -- written by murmur -- 6/11/97 *
