Copy Link
Add to Bookmark
Report
OFFICIAL CHARTER OF THE M00SE ILLUMINATI
OFFICIAL CHARTER OF THE M00SE ILLUMINATI
1) CHAPTERS: Each and every member of the M00se Illuminati is his or her own
chapter. He or she is also the Bull M00se (spiritual leader), Grand Poobah
(political leader), and treasurer (money-handler) of his own chapter.
Therefore, a chapter could be listed as such:
THE BILL DICKSON CHAPTER OF THE M00SE ILLUMINATI
Bull M00se: William R. Dickson
261 Newt Road
Aberdeen, CT 06011
(223) 699-1545
Grand Poobah: Billy Dickson
261 Newt Road
Aberdeen, CT 06011
(223) 699-1545
Treasurer: Bill Dickson
261 Newt Road
Aberdeen, CT 06011
(223) 699-1545
2) THRONGS: Any group of two or more chapters gathered together in one place
is a throng. The more chapters, the bigger the throng.
3) SYMBOL: The symbol is a four-sided, eleven-step pyramid with an eye in
the top step and a three-pronged antler on either side. It once was
thought impossible to draw with text characters, but a case of extreme
boredom one day was cured by the invention of a text-character symbol.
/\
___ / \ ___
/ \ __ / \ __ / \
| \ / \ _ / <()> \ _ / \ / |
| \_/ \_/ \_/________\_/ \_/ \_/ |
\_________________/__I___I___\_________________/ This smaller version
/_I___I___I__\ is used when time or
/I___I___I___I_\ space is short.
/___I___I___I___I\
/__I___I___I___I___\ _ /\ _
/_I___I___I___I___I__\ / \_/\_/ \_/\_/ \
/I___I___I___I___I___I_\ \_____/ () \_____/
/___I___I___I___I___I___I\ / \
/__I___I___I___I___I___I___\ / \__/ \
/_I___I___I___I___I___I___I__\ /__________\
4) SECRET M00SE SIGN: Thumbs to side of head, fingers outstretched to simulate
antlers. Usually accompanied by the Secret M00se Call.
5) SECRET M00SE CALL: BL00P! (Taken from Bloom County.)
6) PURPOSE: To confuse, obfuscate, bewilder, and befuddle the masses.
7) POLITICAL AFFILIATIONS: Varies according to the chapter. The M00se
Illuminati as a whole will support any chapter's beliefs. Thus, the M00se
Illuminati may, at any given time, be supporting any number of contra-
dicting philosophies.
8) NEW MEMBERS: Any chapter can dub new members so long as it uses a silly,
meaningless ceremony that is made up on the spot to do so. It would be
very nice if the Bill Dickson chapter (DICKSON@HARTFORD.BITNET) were
notified so it could record the new member/chapter. This will allow the
Bill Dickson chapter to send all chapters any new information.
9) SECRET NUMBERS: The secret numbers of the M00se Illuminati are 11 (the
number of steps in the pyramid) and 13 (11 + two antlers). Be on the
lookout for these numbers, as they may hold some significance. Also watch
out for 31 (13 transposed) and 11 (11 transposed).
10) PLURAL: The plural of M00se is M00ses--NOT M00se, moosies, moosi, moosei,
moostachios, or Bim Skala Bim.
11) SLASHED 'O's: The 'O's in M00se, Bloop, and all other EXTREMELY m00sey
words are slashed: 0. This apparently originated in the opening credits of
Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Unfortunately, it is impossible to do
this with the lower-case on a computer. In fact, it is now difficult to do
it with the upper-case, as most computers no longer have slashed zeros. We
use the zero where we would want a slashed 'o' anyway, to remind us that we
are making an attempt. Please draw the slashes in if you print a hardcopy.
12) FLEXIBLE RULES: Any of the rules may be changed except for numbers 1, 3,
4, 5, 10, and 11. If you attempt to change a rule in such a way as to
create a paradox, remember that m00ses don't care about paradox.
13) ALWAYS REMEMBER: Bloop! Bloop bloop? BL00P! Bloop? BL0000000P!
