Reading for pleasure Issue 4

eZine lover (@eZine)

Published in 

Reading for pleasure

 · 29 Nov 2023

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 *         R E A D I N G    F O R    P L E A S U R E          * 
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 *                         Issue #4                           * 
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 *                        August 1989                         * 
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 *                 Editor: Cindy Bartorillo                   * 
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CONTACT US AT: Reading For Pleasure, c/o Cindy Bartorillo, 1819 Millstream Drive, Frederick, MD 21701; or on CompuServe leave a message to 74766,1206; or on GEnie leave mail to C.BARTORILLO; or on one of the "home" boards listed in the Distribution Directory.

NOTICE: Reading For Pleasure is not copyrighted, but excerpts from copyrighted material are contained within. When copying or otherwise reproducing any part herein, please give appropriate credit, whether it be to Shakespeare or Reading For Pleasure.

I myself would never work in film. It would be too frustrating. When I'm writing a novel, I have complete control over how everything turns out. Once it gets into the hands of filmmakers, it invariably changes into something different. That's why I never let others adapt my novels for film unless I'm reasonably sure they're going to do things my way.

--James Herbert

I enjoy filmmaking. It's a different experience entirely from writing prose. It's rather fun, actually, so long as you go into it with the understanding that you're part of a team, and you can't do it all yourself. You have to surrender yourself to the process, but if you do, you can get amazing things done. Besides, if you've got fantastically talented people working with you, you'd be a fool not to make use of those talents.

--Clive Barker

TABLE OF CONTENTS

• Distribution Directory
• Editorial
• What's News
• Recent Awards
• Good Reading Periodically
• Random Reviews
• New From Dark Harvest
• About Hollywood
• SILVER SCREAM
• Fiction Into Film
• Joe Bob Briggs
• The Hollywood Mystery
• Featured Author: Fredric Brown
• THE DARK FANTASTIC
• Guest Reviewer: Darryl Kenning
• August Birthdays
• Number One Fan
• Trivia Quiz
• Trivia Answers

CONTRIBUTIONS: We're just ecstatic when we get contributions. Of course we can't pay, but if you'd like to send us a paragraph or two (or even an article), we'd be delighted. Any book-related ideas or opinions are suitable. See masthead for addresses.

COMING NEXT MONTH: Actually, nothing (see Editorial). The next issue will be the October Halloween issue, due out at the end of September. With any luck, there will be at least several terrifying suggestions for your autumn reading.

DISTRIBUTION DIRECTORY

Here are a few bulletin boards where you should be able to pick up the latest issue of Reading For Pleasure. See masthead for where to send additions and corrections to this list.

The Annex         Dayton,OH      John Cooper       513-274-0821 
Beginnings BBS    Levittown,NY   Mike Coticchio    516-796-7296 S 
Billboard         Chicago,IL     Gary Watson       312-289-9808 P 
Boardello         Los Angeles,CA Bryan Tsunoda     213-820-4527 P 
CC-BBS            ManhattanBchCA Chuck Crayne      213-379-8817 P 
Channel 1         Cambridge,MA   Miller & Heder    617-354-8873 P 
CompuNet          Venice,CA      Karen Zinda       213-306-1447 P 
Death Star        Oxon Hill,MD   Lee Pollard       301-839-0705 P 
Diversified Prog  PacPalisadesCA Jean-Pierre Denis 213-459-6053 P 
Eclectic BBS      San Jose,CA    Dave Hunter       408-268-9453 P 
Flying Circus BBS Tempe,AZ       Andy Woodward     602-437-1301 P 
Future Tech       Boston,MA      Napier & Moran    617-720-3600 P 
Futzer Avenue     Issaquah,WA    Stan Symms        206-391-2339 P 
HeavenSoft        Dayton,OH      John Wampler      513-836-4288 
Heath UG          Boston,MA                        617-237-1511 P 
Home DBA Support  Seattle,WA     Mark Findlay      206-789-9302 P 
IBMNew            CompuServe     Library #0 
Inn on the Park   Scottsdale,AZ  Jim Jusko         602-957-0631 P 
Invention Factory New York,NY    Mike Sussell      212-431-1273 P 
JETS              Philadelphia   T.A. Hare         215-928-7503 P 
JForum            CompuServe     Library #8 
KCSS BBS          Seattle,WA     Bob Neddo         206-296-5277 P 
Litforum          CompuServe     Library #1 
Micro Foundry     San Jose,CA    Tom Nelson        408-258-3484 P 
Nostradamus       Los Angeles,CA Al Menache        213-473-4119 P 
Oak Lawn          Oak Lawn,IL    Vince & Chris     312-599-8089 P 
Quantum Connec.   PacPalisadesCA Richard W. Gross  213-459-6748 P 
Riverside Premium Chicago,IL                       312-447-8073 P 
Science Fiction   GEnie          Library #4 
SF & Fantasy      CIS Hom-9      Library #1 
Suburban Software Chicago,IL     Chuck Valecek     312-636-6694 P 
Technoids Anon.   Chandler,AZ    David Cantere     602-899-4876 P 
Writers Happy Hr  Seattle,WA     Walter Scott      206-364-2139 P 
Writers' RT       GEnie          Library #1 
Your Place        Fairfax,VA     Ken Goosens       703-978-6360 P

RFP Home Boards:

Baudline II       Frederick,MD   the Bartorillo's  301-694-7108 
New Micro Connec  Buckeystown,MD Doug Burg         301-698-0212

RFP is also available on any board that participates in the RelayNet (tm) system (request from NetNode).

• P = PC Pursuit-able
• S = StarLink-able

NOTE: Back issues on CompuServe may have been moved to a different library.

You could fit all the sincerity of Hollywood into a flea's navel and still have room left over for two caraway seeds and an agent's heart.

--Fred Allen

EDITORIAL

So now I finally understand why magazines have such long lead times. It has always been, and I'm sure will continue to be, a source of irritation to me, because so often a magazine's "news" is stale -- all because of the long lead time. (Lead time is the time between the writing of an article and the audience's reading of that article.) But now I appreciate that magazines don't get put together overnight, and that "putting together" can't happen until AFTER the articles are turned in.

You see, it takes me most of the month to write/assemble Reading For Pleasure. After that, where do I fit the 2-3 weeks necessary to typeset the written edition? And don't forget the electronic edition needs formatting too. Of course, I don't do all of this myself, but all of these are jobs that have to get done. The question is: when?

The answer is that we have decided to put Reading For Pleasure on a more conventional schedule: a two month schedule. RFP will still be a monthly, but each issue will have taken two months to prepare. During August I will be getting down the words for the October issue. During September, I will be assembling the words for the November issue while the October issue is being formatted and typeset. It's just a matter of thinking an extra month ahead. And as you can see, it means there will be no September issue.

Meanwhile, enjoy this Hollywood issue; we worked some long hours putting it together. And we hope you'll be interested enough to keep an eye out for our Halloween issue in late September. Halloween is our favorite holiday of the year, and we take it very seriously. The October issue will be chock-full of shocking recommendations of horrifying fiction and nonfiction. Keep reading!

*-Cindy

NEW! NEW! NEW! NEW! NEW!

Talk to SYSOP Doug Burg and RFP editor Cindy Bartorillo in a brand-new Horror Conference on The New Micro Connection. Lots of good conversation devoted to the world of horror. See you there.

The New Micro Connection 301-698-0212

FILM NOIR -- A French term for the dark, brooding movies made in the 1940s and 1950s, often starring John Garfield, frequently adapted from Cornell Woolrich stories. This is most appropriately expressed in French, for though the movies came from America, they were most popular in France.

WHAT'S NEWS

• DEEP QUARRY by John E. Stith (see RFP #3) won the Colorado Authors' League Top Hand award for best original adult fiction paperback.
• Tom Clancy's new novel, CLEAR AND PRESENT DANGER, is about a covert military campaign to fight drug smuggling, and Publishers Weekly says it's his best work since THE HUNT FOR RED OCTOBER. Out this month for $21.95 from Putnam.
• J.A. Jance (Judith Ann) writes police procedurals, but not many know how she comes by her interest and knowledge of cops. In 1970, she and her then husband worked as teachers on an Indian reservation in Arizona. One night she worked late and her husband had to hitchhike home, accepting a ride from a stranger in a green car. Later the Jances realized, from descriptions, that the stranger was wanted for three murders, the last committed minutes before picking up Mr. Jance. Once he was caught by police, the murderer admitted that he had been stalking the Jances, planning to kill them before they could tell the police anything. Watching the police building the case against the man provided her education on police methods.
• Looks like there will be something called "Dean Koontz Suspense Theater" on CBS in the near future. DK's film rights agent Patricia Karlan sold the idea to Greg Mayday, VP of movies of the week and miniseries at Warner Bros, who turned the project over to Lee Rich. THE FACE OF FEAR, EYES OF DARKNESS, NIGHT CHILLS, and DARKFALL have already been optioned for "Suspense Theater", two of which are assured of an airing in the first season. Four more books have just been optioned, but I don't have the titles. Feature film interest in MIDNIGHT, DK's latest bestseller will prevent it from being part of this deal. Mr. Koontz is writing a teleplay adaptation of DARKFALL and will serve as executive producer on all productions.
• Last month Tale Weaver Publishing released THE RUBY SLIPPERS OF OZ: The Pursuit, Power and Passion of the World's Most Famous Shoes by Rhys Thomas. Just another 50th Anniversary of The Wizard of Oz book, yes, but this certainly has the narrowest focus. Also good if you have a foot fetish.
• Universal TV has optioned THE EIGHT (the critical hit by Katherine Neville) for a miniseries.
• Did you notice that the TV ads for the movie DEEPSTAR SIX were eerily reminiscent of the recent Michael Crichton novel SPHERE? We've had a real rash of underwater suspense/horror since the bestselling book, when you stop to consider it: DEEPSTAR SIX, LEVIATHAN, LORD OF THE DEEP, and THE ABYSS. Michael Crichton has said: "Some people have suggested that I ought to be taking a close interest in this from a legal standpoint. But that's not my inclination."
• Dame Daphne Du Maurier died in her sleep on April 19, 1989 at her home in Par, Cornwall, England. She is best known for novels like REBECCA (1938), MY COUSIN RACHEL (1951), and THE HOUSE ON THE STRAND (1968). She once said: "I can't say I really like people; perhaps that's why I always preferred to create my own."
• Klaus Maria Brandauer was supposed to play the Russian sub commander in the movie version of Tom Clancy's THE HUNT FOR RED OCTOBER, but, due to a "scheduling conflict", he has been replaced by Sean Connery. Also in the movie are: Alec Baldwin, Scott Glenn, James Earl Jones, Sam Neill and Rip Torn.
• There is a movement afoot to make the first Saturday of November Booklover's Day, when bookstores would have special events and (they hope) just EVERYBODY would buy loads of books. At best it could benefit the cause of literacy, libraries, and bookstores, all dear to the heart of a reader. Booklover's Day will fall on November 4 this year. Stay tuned.
• A city ordinance enacted in April would prevent the sale of any used merchandise (except cars) in San Carlos, a suburb of San Francisco. Tim Christensen, owner of a store that sells used books, plans a First Amendment suit. Good for him, and shame on San Carlos.
• I just heard about SCARE CARE (June Tor hardcover, $19.95), an anthology of new horror stories, edited by Graham Masterton, all of whose profits are being donated to the Scare Care Trust, an organization dedicated to raising money to help abused and needy children everywhere. Authors represented include: Ramsey Campbell, Harlan Ellison, James Herbert and Charles L. Grant.

ZOOM vs. TRACK -- Here you have two ways of following a moving subject with a camera. When the camera zooms, a lens is used that refocuses for the varying distance of the filmed subject; and when the camera tracks, the camera itself follows the subject. During a zoom, the camera doesn't move; during a track, it does.

BOOM -- This is a long arm used to hold a microphone over the heads of the actors, and is famous for occasionally dropping into the shot so it can be seen by the audience.

What in the world is a GAFFER? --The head electrician.
How about a GRIP? --The person in charge of props.
And BEST BOY? --An assistant to the gaffer.

TRIVIA QUIZ

Part One: The following movies were novels first. Can you name the authors?

1. The Accidental Tourist
2. The Agony and the Ecstasy
3. All Quiet on the Western Front
4. All The King's Men
5. Around the World in Eighty Days
6. Ben Hur
7. Blade Runner
8. The Bridge on the River Kwai
9. Butterfield 8
10. The Caine Mutiny
11. The Carpetbaggers
12. The Color Purple
13. Doctor Zhivago
14. East of Eden
15. Exodus
16. The Exorcist
17. Fahrenheit 451
18. Frankenstein
19. From Here to Eternity
20. Giant
21. The Godfather
22. Gone With the Wind
23. The Hunchback of Notre Dame
24. Lost Horizon
25. Love Story
26. The Maltese Falcon
27. Mutiny on the Bounty
28. Of Human Bondage
29. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
30. Quo Vadis
31. The Robe
32. Rosemary's Baby
33. Sophie's Choice
34. The Terminal Man
35. Tom Jones
36. War and Peace
37. Wuthering Heights

Part Two: Can you answer these REALLY trivial questions?

1. What was Alfred Hitchcock's personal explanation for why THE BIRDS attacked?
2. In GREMLINS there is a theater marquee advertising A BOY'S LIFE and WATCH THE SKIES. What is the significance of these titles?
3. In RAIN MAN Dustin Hoffman memorizes a phone book up to and including Marsha and William Gottsegen. Why Marsha and William Gottsegen?
4. Paul Le Mat's 1932 deuce coupe in AMERICAN GRAFFITI has a license plate that reads THX-1138. Why?
5. In WILLOW the two-headed moat monster was called Ebersisk. Why?
6. Blake Edwards cast his real-life doctor in a small part in his film S.O.B. Which part?
7. In 1978, at the age of 22, screenwriter Sam Hamm (BATMAN) earned $42,000 in 5 days. How?
8. What is Michael Keaton's (AKA Batman) real name?
9. In what movie did Humphrey Bogart say, "Play it again, Sam"?
10. Who "received" the first posthumously awarded Oscar?

I do not want actors and actresses to understand my plays. That is not necessary. If they will only pronounce the correct sounds I can guarantee the results.

--George Bernard Shaw

RECENT AWARDS: THE EDGAR AWARD WINNERS

The Mystery Writers of America presented the 1989 Edgar Awards, for works released in 1988, to:

• Best Novel: A COLD RED SUNRISE by Stuart M. Kaminsky
• Best First Novel: CAROLINA SKELETONS by David Stout
• Best Original Paperback: THE TELLING OF LIES by Timothy Findley
• Best Fact Crime: IN BROAD DAYLIGHT by Harry N. MacLean
• Best Critical/Biographical Work: CORNELL WOOLRICH: FIRST YOU DREAM, THEN YOU DIE by Francis M. Nevins
• Best Young Adult: INCIDENT AT LORING GROVES by Sonia Levitin
• Best Juvenile: MEGAN'S ISLAND by Willo Davis Roberts
• Best Short Story: "Flicks" by Bill Crenshaw
• Best Episode in a Television Series: "The Devil's Foot" by Gary Hopkins (MYSTERY)
• Best Television Feature: MAN AGAINST THE MOB by David J. Kinghorn
• Best Motion Picture: THE THIN BLUE LINE by Errol Morris
• Robert L. Fish Award: "Different Drummers" by Linda O. Johnston
• Grand Master Award: Hillary Waugh
• Ellery Queen Award: Richard Levinson and William Link
• Special Edgar: editor Joan Kahn
• Raven Award: Bouchercon

Bouchercon is an annual mystery writers convention in honor of the late mystery editor and writer Anthony Boucher.

Speaking of Bouchercon, the next one (Bouchercon XX) is being held October 6-8, 1989, in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. The Guest of Honor will be Simon Brett and registration is now $40. For registration and information, write: Bouchercon XX, P.O. Box 59345, Philadelphia, PA 19102-9345.

If you're REALLY into planning ahead, Bouchercon XXI will be held September 21-23, 1990, in London, England. For more information, write: Bouchercon XXI, Ming Books UK, 1 Penrose Avenue, Carpenders Park, Watford, Herts WD1 5AE, England.

STOKER AWARD WINNERS

The Bram Stoker Awards are given out by the Horror Writers of America to honor excellence in the horror field.

• Novel: THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS by Thomas Harris
• First Novel: THE SUITING by Kelley Wilde
• Novelette: "Orange is for Anguish, Blue for Insanity" by David Morrell (from PRIME EVIL)
• Short Story: "Night They Missed the Horror Show" by Joe R. Lansdale (from SILVER SCREAM)
• Collection: CHARLES BEAUMONT: SELECTED STORIES (from Dark Harvest)
• Life Achievement Awards: Ray Bradbury & Ronald Chetwyn-Hayes

We see Reading For Pleasure as a sourcebook of ideas for readers. Since you can't read 'em all, it's important to make choices, and the better your choices (better for you, that is), the richer your life will be. We try to help out by passing along some book information for you to add to your overall storehouse.

GOOD READING PERIODICALLY

CINEFANTASTIQUE -- Do you remember the movie magazines of yesteryear? Remember the dark, grainy photos and the crummy newsprint paper? Well, we're all grown up now, and so are our magazines. They're made with slick paper and the photos are razor sharp and in glorious color. Just like CINEFANTASTIQUE, complete with a cover price high enough to make you wince: $4.95 (the July 1989 issue was 62 pages). But inside it's the same superficial, catty, faintly sleazy coverage; the overall magazine persona has its nose in the air and its voice drips sarcasm. The movie magazine is skewed toward science fiction, fantasy, and horror films, particularly those with lavish special effects. The lead time on CINEFANTASTIQUE articles (there are 5 issues a year) seems to be very long, because much of the timely information is inaccurate.

PREMIERE -- This is a difficult magazine to dislike. First, it's a good value at $2.25 for a single issue (the July issue was 100 oversized pages), $18 for 12 monthly issues. Second, the content is intellectually a cut above the other fan magazines. Third, the content is varied; there's something for everyone in every issue. PREMIERE is neither heavy treatises on the Meaning of Film, nor is it a treasury of bitchy gossip, but it is a fun and interesting read for those who care about the current American film scene.

Studio heads have foreheads by dint of electrolysis.

--S.J. Perelman

RANDOM REVIEWS: DON'T WORRY, HE WON'T GET FAR ON FOOT

The Autobiography of a Dangerous Man
by John Callahan
(William Morrow, 1989)

John Callahan is a cartoonist with a macabre sense of humor who lives in Portland, Oregon. He also just happens to be quadriplegic with vast reserves of ambition and determination. The challenges he's faced since the automobile accident in 1972 constitute the majority of his story, which is told with an astonishing lack of sentimentality. He's climbed higher mountains than most of us have ever seen, yet he still has his sanity, and enough objectivity to create sharp-edged cartoons highlighting the problems people have just being people.

This is NOT a depressing book, though it sure could have been. It's not even what you'd call inspirational, in the traditional sense (I did it! And you can too!). DON'T WORRY, HE WON'T GET FAR ON FOOT is John Callahan's way of letting us know that we're all a lot more like each other than most of us have the courage to admit. John is funny, and he's quite an education. You'll be glad you read this book, and you won't soon forget it.

"If you're going to read one book this year about an adopted quadriplegic recovering alcoholic cartoonist from Portland, this should probably be it...well, most likely...I guess. Sort of. Yeah. Just buy it, will you?"

--Bruce Feirstein (REAL MEN DON'T EAT QUICHE)

"I loved this book. It's a compulsively readable chronicle of the resilience of the human spirit, unblemished by even a smidgen of mawkishness. This book has enough trenchancy and wisdom in it to sink a ship full of self-help books. Most important of all, it's the funniest damned thing I've read in a long, long time."

--Jonathan Kellerman (THE BUTCHER'S THEATER)

"I view my career as having passed through three periods. First came my "black" period. Then as I developed, I entered a "black" period. Now my horizons have widened, and I feel myself to have passed through to a third or "black" period. God knows what comes next.

--John Callahan

THE MAKING OF THE AFRICAN QUEEN

or How I went to Africa with Bogart, Bacall and Huston and almost lost my mind
by Katharine Hepburn
(1987)

Even if you can get away this summer, you can always spend a few hours in the 1951 jungles of Africa with Katharine Hepburn and company. She's a rare lady with an unusual point of view, and she adds an interesting twist to the usual travelogue material. You'll learn some interesting details about the making of the movie -- like the fact that they couldn't actually get in the water in Africa. All the scenes in the water had to be shot in London. It seems the water in Africa is very dangerous, as just about everyone in the company found out when their bottled water became contaminated. Everyone, that is, except for Bogart and Huston, (big drinkers of bottled drinks, just not water). But just so you won't be disappointed: this is the story of the making of the movie and of Africa, not a Hollywood confessional. Katharine Hepburn is a fascinating lady, and I thoroughly enjoyed trekking through Africa with her. I bet you will too.

My favorite Hepburn quote: In the course of explaining a rather blatant example of selfishness, she rationalizes, "please yourself and at least someone is pleased". I think that's lovely.

IT ONLY HURTS WHEN I LAUGH

by Stan Freberg
(1988)

Stan Freberg (that's pronounced FREE-berg) has been a success in radio, television, music, and advertising, winning 21 Clios (for advertising) and a Grammy (for music). He's a guerrilla-satirist, in case you were wondering. This book takes his life from the beginning (before he was born) up to 1963 when he created a commercial for Stanley Kramer's movie IT'S A MAD MAD MAD MAD WORLD. There are several quasi-apologies for not including more of his advertising work, most of which has occurred since 1963 (like his controversial airline ads, or his much-loved prune ads); a sequel is already promised.

No apologies are needed for this autobiography, one of the most enjoyable I've read in quite a while. Mr. Freberg is a charming man with a fabulous memory for names. Every business meeting is recounted in all of its hilarious glory; no one is spared, including himself. And there are some great stories here: Like the one where David Merrick, producing a stage version of Freberg's history of America, insists that he cut Abraham Lincoln out of the Civil War because he's "unnecessary". Or the one about the big-time PR firm in New York that is being paid for one simple job: to pick a date for the publicity party for the New York drama critics. You can't pick a date when another play is opening, because no one would show up. Well, no one shows up, and it turns out they chose the night the New York Drama Critics Circle Awards are voted on.

Then there's Stan Freberg talking about Jack Webb: "Webb was a perfectionist but had a picture on his wall that he said helped keep him humble. It was a large black and white blowup of his star on Hollywood's Walk of Fame. JACK WEBB, it proclaimed, but a dog had left his regards in the middle of the star."

There's no WAY I'm going to miss the next volume of Stan Freberg's memoirs.

A CAST OF KILLERS

by Sidney D. Kirkpatrick
(1986)

What fun this is -- a real-life mystery that spans 60 years:

1922: On February 1, the respected silent-film director William Desmond Taylor is shot to death in his Los Angeles bungalow. It was said that when the police arrived, the head of Paramount Studios was already there, burning a bundle of papers in the fireplace. A "well-known actress" was also supposedly there, searching for letters she claimed were hers. The police never solved the case.

1967: Respected director King Vidor (NORTHWEST PASSAGE, WAR AND PEACE, DUEL IN THE SUN, THE FOUNTAINHEAD) decides to make a movie about the Taylor murder and realizes that presenting the actual solution to the mystery would make a great gimmick for the film -- so he investigates on his own. Amazingly, King Vidor solves the crime, partially due to his insider status in Hollywood. But because of the explosive nature of the solution, he decides not to make the film, and hides all his evidence in a box in the basement of his office.

1982: King Vidor has died and his official biographer, Sidney Kirkpatrick, finds his box of evidence on the Taylor murder. Painstakingly, he reconstructs not only Taylor's murder, but Vidor's investigation; and you can read about all of it in A CAST OF KILLERS. A fascinating story of a real-life murder and an actual amateur investigation.

LUCID DREAMING

by Stephen LaBerge, Ph.D.

Have you ever had a dream that you knew AT THE TIME was a dream? Maybe your first grade teacher flew by, upside down, with green hair and holding a buffalo, and you said to yourself, "This isn't right, she wasn't this good looking. I bet I'm dreaming." This is called a lucid dream, and studies have shown that most people have at least a couple of such episodes.

But what if you could have full-length lucid dreams regularly? You could have conversations with Einstein, fly to the Netherlands without a plane, or frolic on a beach in Tahiti with nice-looking natives. You'd only be limited by your imagination. Sleep time could be the best part of the day.

According to Dr. LaBerge's research, lucid dreaming is actually a learnable skill, and he's proved it at the Stanford University Sleep Research Center. In LUCID DREAMING he tells the story of dream research up to the present day -- how deliberate lucid dreaming wasn't even believed in the beginning, and yet now it's an accepted part of sleep dynamics.

There are various methods used to bring on a lucid dream. One method involves trying to enter the sleep state without actually losing consciousness (unconscious and asleep are two different things). This is appropriate only for people who can fall asleep VERY quickly, and is only really effective when practiced in the morning hours after having woken up briefly. You see, most lucid dreams take place during REM sleep, and most REM sleep occurs towards the end of your sleep time. So your chances of having a lucid dream are much better the longer you sleep.

The most common method for encouraging lucid dreams is to learn to tell when you're dreaming. Most dreams are accepted as reality, at least at the time, because we aren't very careful about distinguishing the differences between dreams and reality. Get in the habit of questioning whether you're really awake, all day long. If you regularly question reality during the day, you'll have a greater tendency to question it during the night.

One of the best tests is to read something, look away, then read it again. If it reads the same way twice, you're awake. Dream writing is usually very hard to read at all, and is constantly twisting and changing. Another good test is to try to fly. If you succeed, it's a good bet you're dreaming.

It's also a good idea to take advantage of individual quirks. For instance, in reality I have 3 cats but in many of my dreams I have more than 3. If I could get in the habit of checking on the number of cats, I could learn to recognize that whenever I count more than 3, I'm dreaming.

Some people are better lucid dreamers than others, of course. Generally speaking, if you remember a lot of your dreams, you'll probably be good at lucid dreaming. If you don't remember your dreams, you can't make any progress because you have nothing to work with. Of course, some people have markedly improved their dream memory with practice and force of will, so there's hope for everyone. (See CREATIVE DREAMING by Dr. Patricia Garfield.)

If you're REALLY interested in learning even more about lucid dreams, you can contact Dr. LaBerge at the Lucidity Institute. They put out a quarterly newsletter, which you can subscribe to for $35 a year (you also get discounts on books and products, and can participate in their dream research). Write to The Lucidity Institute, P.O. Box 2364, Stanford, CA 94309. They're hoping to be marketing a Lucidity Kit soon, which will probably consist of their DreamLight (a special device to signal to yourself while dreaming) and training materials.

If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job.

--Woody Allen

NEW FROM DARK HARVEST: RAZORED SADDLES

edited by Joe R. Lansdale & Pat LoBrutto
Illustrated by Rick Araluce

The West will never be the same.

And for that matter, neither will the other points of the compass.

RAZORED SADDLES is the anthology that gives the Western a black hat and a bad name -- and in this case, all to the better.

Dark Harvest, renowned for its horror publishing, has taken a bold departure with RAZORED SADDLES. Here is a book not only of horror tales, but a wide variety of other types.

There are stories inspired by every aspect of the West or the Western myth. The Modern West, Country and Western music, Futuristic Westerns, Horror Westerns, Humorous Westerns, just plain odd Westerns.

From the Lone Prairie to today's sidewalk, to beyond the stars. From the only American Indian hit man in the Mafia to a dinosaur roundup, these are the most bizarre stories ever to be inspired by the word Western.

Horrific tales by writers like Robert R. McCammon, Richard Laymon, F. Paul Wilson, Chet Williamson and Ardath Mayhar.

Strange stories by David J. Schow, Howard Waldrop, Al Sarrantonio, and rising stars, Scott Cupp, Robert Petitt and Gary Raisor.

Unclassifiable tales by Neal Barrett, Jr., Joe R. Lansdale, Lewis Shiner, Melissa Mia Hall, Lenore Carroll and Richard Christian Matheson.

This is the most eccentric book to come along in quite some time.

Yippie ki yea.

Deluxe, slip-cased, first edition, limited to 600 numbered copies, signed by ALL contributors ----- $59

Trade Hardcover ----- $19.95

Publication Date: August 1989
Please add $1 per book to cover postage

Dark Harvest, P.O. Box 941, Arlington Heights, IL 60006

You get those people who haven't been out of Beverly Hills in ten years, and they're telling you how people talk in Detroit. There is so much input on any one project that you have to wonder how any movie that originated as a book can actually work.

--Elmore Leonard

If the recent release of the movie INDIANA JONES AND THE LAST CRUSADE has put you in an adventure mood, why not try Indy's immediate ancestor, Allan Quatermain? H. Rider Haggard (1856 - 1925) wrote over forty novels, a number of which featured Allan Quatermain, a dead ringer for Indy. Haggard was one of the most popular authors of his day, which you'll understand if you try any of his four most famous novels: KING SOLOMON'S MINES, SHE, ALLAN QUATERMAIN, and AYESHA: THE RETURN OF "SHE".

ABOUT HOLLYWOOD

RETAKES: BEHIND THE SCENES OF 500 CLASSIC MOVIES by John Eastman (1989) -- A nearly perfect browsing book for movie lovers. About a page (a paperback page) of interesting detail (and occasionally dirt) for each movie covered. And don't worry about the word "classic"; the loose definition used allows even POPEYE to be included.

THE ALFRED HITCHCOCK ALBUM by Michael Haley (1981) -- This book was produced shortly after Hitchcock's death, so it is complete. As the name implies it has loads and loads of photos; from his 53 movies, from the movie sets, and family shots. The accompanying text is interesting, but covers nothing in depth.

AN ILLUSTRATED HISTORY OF THE HORROR FILM by Carlos Clarens (1967) -- Out of date, of course, but was written back before interest in horror films was acceptable and, being literate, was the only source of intelligent commentary for a long time. Still worth reading on the earlier movies.

AMERICAN HORRORS: Essays on the Modern American Horror Film edited by Gregory A. Waller (1987) -- What more evidence do you need that the horror film has arrived: a collection of academic papers from the University of Illinois Press? Interesting, but not nearly as much fun for the fan as Clarens' book.

ROGER EBERT'S MOVIE HOME COMPANION (updated regularly) -- Like a "home version" of a TV show, you can have genuine Roger Ebert reviews to thumb through whenever you want. Particularly valuable before a visit to your video rental store since only movies available on cassette are discussed.

HITCHCOCK by Francois Truffaut (1967) -- This is the best book about Hitchcock I've found. Truffaut is not only knowledgeable (obviously), he's also a true fan.

CULT MOVIES (Vols. 1, 2, 3) by Danny Peary (1981, 1983, 1988) -- There are 4-6 pages of text and black and white photos for each movie covered, but with an oversized book and small print, there's still plenty of text coverage. Great browsing books. Vol. 1 includes: Casablanca, Citizen Kane, Halloween, Mad Max, 2001: A Space Odyssey, The Maltese Falcon, King Kong, 93 others. Vol. 2 includes: Altered States, The Bride of Frankenstein, Some Like It Hot, Last Tango in Paris, Barbarella, 45 others. Vol. 3 includes: Annie Hall, Body Heat, Psycho, The Terminator, Easy Rider, The Night of the Hunter, Diva, 43 others.

THE LIVING AND THE UNDEAD: From Stoker's DRACULA to Romero's DAWN OF THE DEAD by Gregory A. Waller (1986) -- Here's another book from Waller; this time a hefty 360-page treatise on the vampire. If you can stand that much vampire commentary, this is definitely the book to get.

THE ZOMBIES THAT ATE PITTSBURGH: The Films of George A. Romero by Paul R. Gagne (1987) -- A must for Romero fans, who will be happy to know that there are many completely disgusting photos (some in glorious slick color). My favorite is the full-color close-up of a person who's caught just at the critical moment as their head explodes. Unforgettable (even if you want to).

THE MOON'S A BALLOON by David Niven (1972) -- The man is as charming on paper as he was on the screen. When you get done with this one, continue with his BRING ON THE EMPTY HORSES (1975).

THE BOOK OF VIDEO LISTS by Tom Wiener (1988) -- Here's the book on videocassettes you really need. The last two-thirds of the book is a master list of all the movies covered, with brief descriptions and marked RECOMMENDED or HIGHLY RECOMMENDED i appropriate (Mr. Wiener has unusual, but interesting, taste). The first third is made up of lists: movies by category, by star, by director, even by author. Like Cary Grant movies? Clint Eastwood movies? Classic film noir? Hitchcock? It's all here, right at your fingertips.

STAY OUT OF THE SHOWER: 25 Years of Shocker Films Beginning with "Psycho" by William Schoell (1985) -- A very nice book to have: loads of black and white stills and coverage that is fun without being targeted at 8-year-olds.

HUMPHREY BOGART by Nathaniel Benchley (1975) -- Benchley was a close friend of Bogart's, and tells his fascinating story with humor and affection. Lots of black and white photos too.

HORRORSHOWS by Gene Wright (1986) -- Here's a nice volume for horror fans, with coverage of film, TV, radio and theater. Information is arranged by chapters titled: Crazies and Freaks; Mad Scientists; Monsters; Cataclysmic Disasters; Ghouls; Ghosts, Demons and Witches; Vampires; Mummies; Werewolves and Other Shape-Shifters; Zombies; Splatter; Anthologies; Horror-Makers.

THEY CAME FROM OUTER SPACE: 12 Classic Science Fiction Tales That Became Major Motion Pictures edited by Jim Wynorski (1980) -- Includes the following short stories:

• "Dr. Cyclops" by Henry Kuttner; filmed as DR. CYCLOPS (1940).
• "Who Goes There?" by John W. Campbell, Jr.; filmed as THE THING FROM ANOTHER WORLD (1951) and THE THING (1982).
• "Farewell to the Master" by Harry Bates; filmed as THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL (1951).
• "The Fog Horn" by Ray Bradbury; filmed as THE BEAST FROM 20,000 FATHOMS (1953).
• "Deadly City" by Ivar Jorgenson; filmed as TARGET EARTH (1954).
• "The Alien Machine" by Raymond F. Jones; filmed as THIS ISLAND EARTH (1955).
• "The Cosmic Frame" by Paul W. Fairman; filmed as INVASION OF THE SAUCERMEN (1957).
• "The Fly" by George Langelaan; filmed as THE FLY (1958 & 1986).
• "The Seventh Victim" by Robert Sheckley; filmed as THE TENTH VICTIM (1965).
• "The Sentinel" by Arthur C. Clarke; filmed as 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY (1968).
• "The Racer" by Ib Melchior; filmed as DEATH RACE 2000 (1975).
• "A Boy and His Dog" by Harlan Ellison; filmed as A BOY AND HIS DOG (1975).

(AUTO)BIOGRAPHIES OF NOTE:

• MY STORY by Mary Astor (also her A LIFE ON FILM)
• LAUREN BACALL BY MYSELF by Lauren Bacall
• A POSTILLION STRUCK BY LIGHTNING by Dirk Bogarde
• MONTGOMERY CLIFT by Patricia Bosworth
• LULU IN HOLLYWOOD by Louise Brooks
• WILL THERE REALLY BE A MORNING? by Frances Farmer
• MY WICKED, WICKED WAYS by Errol Flynn
• MABEL by Betty Fussell (about Mabel Normand)
• THE MOVIES, MR. GRIFFITH, AND ME by Lillian Gish
• STARRING FRED ASTAIRE by Stanley Green & Burt Goldblatt
• WHEN THE MOVIES WERE YOUNG by Mrs. D.W. Griffith
• ON CUKOR by Gavin Lambert
• DON'T FALL OFF THE MOUNTAIN by Shirley MacLaine
• CHANGE LOBSTERS AND DANCE by Lilli Palmer
• MY LIFE AND MY FILMS by Jean Renoir
• ENCOUNTERING DIRECTORS by Charles T. Samuels
• INTERVIEWS WITH FILM DIRECTORS by Andrew Sarris
• HITCHCOCK by John Russell Taylor (the authorized biography)
• DEAR ME by Peter Ustinov

MISCELLANEOUS BOOKS ABOUT HOLLYWOOD:

As I do not approve of the current wave of violence that we see on our screens, I have always felt that murder should be treated delicately. And, in addition to that, with the help of television, murder should be brought into the home where it rightly belongs.

--Alfred Hitchcock

MacGUFFIN -- This was Alfred Hitchcock's term for anything that grabs the audience's interest and moves the plot forward, but that ultimately can be forgotten. The stealing-the-money subplot in PSYCHO is a MacGuffin. As a point of trivia, here is the original semi-joke that Hitchcock took the word from:

Two men are traveling on a train to Scotland.
On the luggage rack is a large bundle.
"What is that package?" asked one of the men.
"Oh, that's a MacGuffin," replied his friend.
"What's a MacGuffin?"
"It's a device for trapping lions in the Scottish Highlands."
"But there aren't any lions in the Scottish Highlands!"
"Well, then, I guess that's not a MacGuffin."

SILVER SCREAM

directed by David J. Schow
(1988)

Not only does David J. Schow's anthology fit this month's theme, it is also required reading for the horror enthusiast. There's such a fabulous variety here that no one is likely to appreciate all of the stories, but you'll get a thorough tour of the land where horror dwells today and you'll probably find some countries that you'd like to explore in greater depth, as well as some countries you never want to see again. Very educational. And lots and lots of fun.

Introduction by Tobe Hooper: An appropriate, if not terribly informative, initiation to the tales that follow, from the

FADE IN: HOLLYWOOD MANSION -- NIGHT

to its

FADE TO BLACK

"Preflash" by John M. Ford: Hallucinatory account of a man who can foresee others' deaths. Cinematic, dark, moody.

"Cuts" by F. Paul Wilson: An author whose novel was desecrated in the screen adaptation gets revenge. Does this mean Mr. Wilson was not pleased with the movie version of THE KEEP?

"The Movie People" by Robert Bloch: Lovely, haunting story that'll have you paying a lot more attention to movie extras.

"Sinema" by Ray Garton: Not all movies are made in a studio, nor are the people in them always actors. Or even willing. Not bad, but nauseating, and was done better in "Apt Pupil" by Stephen King.

"Son of Celluloid" by Clive Barker: This is a reprint from BOOKS OF BLOOD VOLUME III, and it's still outrageously hideous, bewilderingly original. Like so many Barker stories. This one has a cancerous tumor that does a John Wayne impression. No foolin'.

"The Answer Tree" by Steven R. Boyett: Film criticism can be hazardous to your mental health.

"Night They Missed The Horror Show" by Joe R. Lansdale: Working very hard to offend absolutely everyone, Mr. Lansdale succeeds.

"More Sinned Against" by Karl Edward Wagner: A would-be starlet gets an advanced degree in Using Others To Get What You Want. An unblinking, gritty story.

"Return of the Neon Fireball" by Chet Williamson: If you want something bad enough, it's just possible you might get it. A tale right out of the Twilight Zone.

"Night Calls The Green Falcon" by Robert R. McCammon: My favorite story in this anthology. Mr. McCammon specializes in depicting the psychologically maimed.

"Bargain Cinema" by Jay Sheckley: A very brief Deathstyles of the Emotionally Poor & the Intellectually Destitute.

"Lifecast" by Craig Spector: Special effects wizard gets revenge on his philistine director, but, as usual, the cost is high.

"Sirens" by Richard Christian Matheson: Thoughts (and lusts) can sometimes have a terrible external reality. A short-short.

"Hell" by Richard Christian Matheson: Story of random, anonymous evil reminiscent of Spielberg's movie DUEL.

"A Life in the Cinema" by Mick Garris: Typical Hollywood director/louse tries to revive his ailing career with a freak baby. Story has all the charm of IT'S ALIVE.

"Splatter: A Cautionary Tale" by Douglas E. Winter: A reprint from MASQUES II, we find here that the only thing more ugly than some examples of modern horror is censorship. Similar (in theme) to A CLOCKWORK ORANGE by Anthony Burgess.

"Film At Eleven" by John Skipp: Does TV news merely record what would have happened anyway, or does it create what it reports? Does a dying person really die if there isn't a camera crew to cover it?

"The Show Goes On" by Ramsey Campbell: Typical dream-like tale from Campbell, full of the childish fears that none of us ever quite grow out of. A reprint from his collection DARK COMPANIONS.

"The Cutter" by Edward Bryant: Sharp-as-diamonds story of an unhappy boy who learns that the film editor's art can be used to edit reality.

"Pilgrims to the Cathedral" by Mark Arnold: My least favorite. A tale that had potential ultimately goes nowhere, with a 12-page gore-fest tacked on to the end. Note: gore plays better in a movie than it reads.

"Endsticks" by David J. Schow: Not a story, this is where the editor explains how this anthology came to exist, and where he introduces (belatedly) the authors. At first I wondered why he left these introductions until the end of the book, but after thinking about it, I think I prefer it this way. Already being familiar with at least one story from the author gave me a hook to hang the biographical information on.

By "biographical information", don't assume Mr. Schow gives the usual "He was born in whenever, studied at whoknows, and now lives with his wife and two rabbits in wherever." Oh, no. Instead, you get to hear all about Ooze-Its, secret nicknames, and Jay Sheckley's measurements (36-24-36). Sort of New Wave Biography, I guess.

David J. Schow is, by the way, a most fascinating and surprising writer. He uses words like "mucilaginous" and "upchuckify", and says things like, "Little Johnny Skipp, horror's Number-One Garbage Pail kid, who waves a big hello from his end of the evolutionary chart". You just may find yourself seeking out more Schow material (Hint: THE KILL RIFF is in paperback now).

Drama is life with the dull bits left out.

--Alfred Hitchcock

FICTION INTO FILM: DEATH OF A SALESMAN

play by Arthur Miller
TV adaptation (available on videotape) directed by
Volker Schlondorff

What we have here is Arthur Miller's contention that our modern American value system just doesn't work. Willy Loman has equated being a success as a human being with being a financial success, something which he has never even approached. To save face and win the love of his friends and family, he tries to pretend that he's a great success, which becomes increasingly difficult during the course of the play. Willy continually alienates those he loves out of fear that they will see through the illusion he so carefully constructs. The tragic irony is that his friends and family have NEVER been fooled by Willy's pretensions; their values aren't flawed as his are, so they are able to see his worth and love him anyway. Willy has never realized this.

Schlondorff's adaptation stars Dustin Hoffman as Willy Loman in a simply breathtaking performance as an essentially good man unraveling before his own eyes. The tragic irony is served up by his son Biff who tries so hard to show his love for Willy; and is played by John Malkovich (of DANGEROUS LIAISONS) working ably off of Hoffman's lead. Kate Reid is good as his devoted wife Linda, as is Charles Durning as Willy's good neighbor Charlie, who does a fine job until the very end. He seems uncomfortable with his last speech, but then it takes a special person to use the word "dast" with ease. All in all, this is a masterful production, and completely faithful to Miller's original intentions. The only complaint I have is that the dialogue is rattled off very fast at times, and if you're not already familiar with it, you're going to miss things.

Should you read the play or see the tape? I really think you'd enjoy both, but certainly you must read the play first. It reads very well, and you'll have the time to fully consider all of the important parts, of which there are many. This is a complex play with many things to think about, which could help explain why it won a Pulitzer Prize and the Drama Critics Circle Prize. Theater at its tragic best.

FOR EXTRA CREDIT: Arthur Miller had a hidden agenda here that you might care to know about. Tragedy, according to the formal definition by Aristotle, concerns people who are significantly better than the average person, who start out happy and wind up much less so. This is why so many classical tragedies (drama and fiction) concern gods. Arthur Miller wanted to show that tragedy should, on the contrary, deal with the Common Man; that the plight of the "nobody" has importance and the power to move us, and ultimately has more meaning for us than the fate of the more distant gods.

PIECE TO MEMORIZE: Generally recognized as the most significant line in the play is the one spoken by Linda toward the end of Act One: "I don't say he's a great man. Willy Loman never made a lot of money. His name was never in the paper. He's not the finest character that ever lived. But he's a human being, and a terrible thing is happening to him. So attention must be paid. He's not to be allowed to fall into his grave like an old dog. Attention, attention must be finally paid to such a person."

DEATHTRAP: A Thriller in Two Acts

play by Ira Levin
screenplay adaptation by Jay Presson Allen
movie directed by Sidney Lumet

To begin with, there are (at least) two DEATHTRAPs. DEATHTRAP One is a play by Ira Levin: 2 acts, 5 characters, about a husband-and-friend team who murder the wife. DEATHTRAP Two is a play written by two characters in DEATHTRAP One: 2 acts, 5 characters, about a husband-and-friend team who murder the wife. You with me? Maybe you'd better take notes.

This play is a lot of fun, and I'm going to try not to ruin any of it for those of you who don't know the story. As you've already gathered, the play-within-a-play, self-referential aspects of DEATHTRAP predominate, much of which is rather lost in the movie version. A movie looks like real life, which is what makes a movie so exciting and immediate; but you don't get the feeling of watching a PLAY, which is unfortunate in this case. Seeing DEATHTRAP on the stage is better, but for all the nuances, get a copy of the play (mine's from Penguin) and read it.

At one point, one of the characters reads from DEATHTRAP Two, and what they read is word-for-word from DEATHTRAP One. It's the description of the set, which you won't get unless you have the written play. However, the written play will ruin the movie more than the movie will ruin the play, so if you want to see the movie, do that first. There are even some added in-jokes in Lumet's version, for instance: The lead character, a playwright, has a play opening on Broadway at the Music Box Theater, which is where DEATHTRAP actually opened in 1978. He also has this same character use the expression "fwow up" in reference to reviews of his play, which is an allusion to a famous Constant Reader column written by Dorothy Parker. None of these in-jokes are critical to understanding the play, they're just icing.

The movie, by the way, is somewhat changed from Ira Levin's original play, and I'm not so sure the changes are successful. Many of the deletions struck me as sloppy: they cut the explanation of who Lottie and Ralph are in Act 1 Scene 1, but left in a reference to them in Act 1 Scene 3, so everyone sits around thinking, "Who are Lottie and Ralph?" The added material, more often than not, was unnecessary padding.

The performances were all good, the five-member cast being: Michael Caine, Christopher Reeve, Dyan Cannon, Irene Worth, and Henry Jones. The tone of Christopher Reeve's character was altered for the movie, probably for controversy and shock value, and the ending was changed (in specifics, not in tone). The new ending worked well, but I would rather have seen Henry Jones play it, as his character would have in Ira Levin's version. I'm a big fan of Henry Jones.

DEATHTRAP is a delightful comic thriller by Ira Levin, who is certainly one of the more versatile writers around today. As convoluted and breathless as a roller coaster ride, and even more fun. See it, then read it.

THE ACCIDENTAL TOURIST

novel by Anne Tyler
screenplay by Frank Galati & Lawrence Kasdan
movie directed by Lawrence Kasdan

I'm not sure I'm the right person to comment on this book and movie, but since I'm the only one here right now, we'll have to make do. I will state up front that I'm not a big fan of realistic fiction. Sounds odd to me -- that's why we have nonfiction. Anyway...

Macon Leary is a man afraid of life, living behind a glass wall. He and his wife recently lost their 12-year-old son, but Macon was stifled long before that. As teenagers, his wife Sarah was initially attracted to him because he ignored her, a lesson which he took to heart. He maintains that reserve to this day, a disinterest which he finds has become less an act and more actual as time has passed. Typically, Macon's job is writing tour guides dedicated to helping a traveler feel like he never left home (the point: experience less, not more).

Macon's nadir arrives after his wife leaves him and he cuts himself off from life until he is sleeping in what he calls a "body bag". At this point he meets Muriel, who is spontaneous, mercurial, and complex. Later, after the various events of the story, Macon's education is complete when he refuses to take a pain killer, preferring to face life as it is, not through a deadening filter. Anne Tyler creates people who are startlingly real; I know many of these characters very well.

So how does the movie stack up? Lawrence Kasdan's version turns out to be a direct condensation of Anne Tyler's novel. Other than the necessary deletions for time, the movie is faithful to the book right down the line; a visual version. William Hurt is Macon Leary, and does his usual excellent job, vividly displaying Macon's distance from people, as well as his intelligence, humor, and pain. Geena Davis is appealingly ditzy, and Kathleen Turner is fine as the wife who supports Macon's psychological problems rather than helping them. A fine movie adaptation of a character-rich novel.

THE BIG CLOCK (filmed as NO WAY OUT)

novel by Kenneth Fearing
screenplay by Robert Garland
movie directed by Roger Donaldson

If you're not familiar with either the movie or the book, you're in for a rare treat: a clever book that has been radically overhauled to make a brilliant movie. I'm not sure we'll ever see this happen again. The novel by Fearing is a great read, it's main failing is its brevity. You'll want to read the book in addition to the movie if only for the character Louise Patterson, who does not appear in the movie. Her chapter alone makes the book worthwhile. (Random note: I couldn't help but visualize Louise Patterson as a fortyish Colleen Dewhurst.)

The movie is pure delight. All of the basic concepts and plot elements are retained, but EVERY detail has been altered. Instead of the magazine world in New York, the movie is set in and around Washington D.C. Instead of Earl Janoth, publishing king, we have David Brice, Secretary of Defense. Instead of George Stroud, genius magazine editor, we have Tom Farrell, genius Navy career man. All of the changes, in my opinion, made the movie more focused and immediate, shifting this story from an intellectual exercise into an edge-of-the-seat thriller.

Part of the fun is both reading the book AND seeing the movie, and appreciating what a wonderful job Robert Garland did with the adaptation. Unfortunately for this review, I don't want to say any more about the plot. This is one story that could easily be ruined by advance knowledge, and for that reason I recommend seeing the movie first -- the book is so subtle that you may need to have seen the movie to catch all of the plot intricacies. HIGHLY recommended.

It was apparent from the first that STAR WARS was an outsize elephant with the brains of a gnat.

--Brian Aldiss

JOE BOB GOES TO THE DRIVE-IN

by Joe Bob Briggs
Introduction by Stephen King
(1987)

How sick is your local newspaper?

Do you live in a wholesome American community?
Can the people in your community read?
Can they read a newspaper?

If the answer to any of the above is yes, you may never have heard of "Joe Bob Goes to the Drive-In", the only newspaper column ever to be

<-> banned in Fort Smith, Arkansas; Dallas, Texas; Cleveland, Ohio; and Raleigh, North Carolina

<-> picketed by feminists in San Francisco

<-> condemned from the pulpit in Tyler, Texas

<-> endorsed by Hustler magazine

<-> excluded from the finest homes in America and laughed at by millions

So what have you missed? You missed a brilliant review of BLOODSUCKING FREAKS, an analysis of GAS PUMP GIRLS and INVASION OF THE BLOOD FARMERS that could stop your heart, and the official breast count in I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE.

Joe Bob Briggs is the world's only drive-in movie columnist.
Accept no substitutes.

THE JOE BOB BIO

Born: Frontage Road, Texas
Current residence: Trailer park in Grapevine, Texas
Occupation: America's foremost expert on drive-ins, having seen 14,500 movies out under the stars like God intended, in the privacy of my personal automobile. I am host of DRIVE-IN THEATRE, only on The Movie Channel.
Turn-ons: Garbonzas, new seat covers for my Toronado, NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD -- the #1 drive-in movie of all time, and Bo "is-it-time-to-get-nekkid-again-John" Derek.
Turn-offs: Wimps, Commies, and buttered popcorn, because it messes up the new seat covers.
Favorite power tool: Chain saws, what else?

JOE BOB GOES TO THE DRIVE-IN
Cindy says check it out.

It's the first screenplay I've written where the lead character is an overt psychopath.

--Sam Hamm, speaking of BATMAN

The key thing about Batman is that he has no special powers. He's an ordinary guy who's extraordinarily repressed, psychologically. If someone asked Bruce Wayne, "Why do you put on a Bat-suit?" he wouldn't really know. He's the kind of person who should have been in therapy a long, long time ago.

--Michael Keaton

THE HOLLYWOOD MYSTERY

There are no symbols in NORTH BY NORTHWEST. Oh yes! The last shot. The train entering the tunnel after the love scene between Grant and Eva Marie Saint! It's a phallic symbol. But don't tell anyone!

--Alfred Hitchcock

FEATURED AUTHOR: FREDRIC BROWN

First off, please note the spelling of Fredric. That's not a mistake. It's a nice piece of intellectual snobbery to be one of the few who knows something obscure, like that the former President's name is Harry S Truman (no period after the S).

You can get Fredric Brown's life story from any number of locations, but the two facts to know about Brown, from the perspective of a reader are:

1. He is known as a "pulp" writer, meaning that he sold his words cheaply and often, mostly to magazines printed on cheap "pulp" paper. What this means to you is that there are many Brown stories (and a number of novels) to read and the quality of the writing is remarkably consistent. Because that's the whole trick of being a successful pulp writer -- consistency. Brown never wrote the Great American Novel, but he did write well, as you can (and should) find out for yourself.
2. Fredric Brown had an obsession with liquor. Whether or not he was an alcoholic is of no real concern to me, but you can't possibly read much Brown material without realizing that he considered drinking liquor to be one of life's fundamental activities. The best example is THE SCREAMING MIMI; you could get queasy just reading it. I'm not sure what ultimate relevance this has, but it's one of the first things most people remember about Fredric Brown's writing (particularly the mysteries).

Here are some significant Brown offerings, with commentary for the novels that I've read recently.

THE FABULOUS CLIPJOINT (1947) Ed & Am Hunter mystery novel. Ed Hunter wants to find out who killed his father, and his uncle Am decides to help out, and together they are Brown's only continuing characters. Only average as a mystery. The "fabulous clipjoint" of the title is Chicago.

THE DEAD RINGER (1948) Ed & Am Hunter mystery novel

MURDER CAN BE FUN (1948) Mystery novel

THE BLOODY MOONLIGHT (1949) Ed & Am Hunter mystery novel

WHAT MAD UNIVERSE (1949) Science fiction novel. A parallel universe story, and one of Brown's most famous books. I think this would be a bit "cute" for most of today's SF readers.

THE SCREAMING MIMI (1949) Mystery novel. One of Brown's absolute best. A Ripper is loose, and reporter/alcoholic Bill Sweeney becomes obsessed with the woman who is nearly the fourth victim. You'll be assembling the pieces of the puzzle right along with Bill. Will you figure it out first? Also notable for Bill's Herculean consumption of alcohol.

COMPLIMENTS OF A FIEND (1950) Ed & Am Hunter mystery novel

HERE COMES A CANDLE (1950) Mystery novel

NIGHT OF THE JABBERWOCK (1950) Mystery novel. Doc Stoeger publishes a small town newspaper and yearns for excitement. Before the night's over, he'll have rubbed elbows with big-city mobsters, an escaped lunatic, and a bank robber (we won't even mention the four murders). There are also plenty of allusions to the writings of Doc's favorite author, Lewis Carroll.

THE CASE OF THE DANCING SANDWICHES (1951) Mystery novelette

DEATH HAS MANY DOORS (1951) Ed & Am Hunter mystery novel

THE FAR CRY (1951) Mystery novel. George Weaver, recovering from a breakdown, rents the house where Jenny Ames was murdered eight years ago. The murderer was never caught, so George decides to investigate on his own. He may wish he hadn't. A few rather large logical problems here, but a compellingly told story.

SPACE ON MY HANDS (1951) Science fiction short stories

WE ALL KILLED GRANDMA (1952) Mystery novel

THE DEEP END (1952) Mystery novel. A local high-school student is killed in what seems to be just another tragic accident, at least to everyone but journalist Sam Evans. He uncovers a series of suspicious accidents that look, to Sam, very much like murder. Or is Sam going off THE DEEP END (get it?). Well-done example of what is now a standard mystery plot.

MADBALL (1953) Paperback original mystery novel

THE LIGHTS IN THE SKY ARE STARS (1953) Science fiction novel

MOSTLY MURDER (1953) Mystery short stories

ANGELS AND SPACESHIPS (1954) Science fiction short stories

HIS NAME WAS DEATH (1954) Mystery novel. Brief exploration of the effects of chance occurrence (fate) on a murderer. If Darius hadn't come home early, he wouldn't have had to kill Myrtle. If Joyce hadn't given out $10 bills, Darius wouldn't have had to kill Claude. If Claude hadn't gone home early, Darius wouldn't have had to kill Rose. And if Joyce hadn't been so interested in the murders, Darius wouldn't have had to kill her. One things for sure: Darius is being kept very busy.

MARTIANS, GO HOME (1955) Science fiction novel. From what I've heard, this seems to be the novel most respected by today's SF fans. Unfortunately for me, I haven't been able to find a decent copy.

THE WENCH IS DEAD (1955) Mystery novel

THE LENIENT BEAST (1956) Mystery novel. John Medley kills, again. Frank Ramos is a Mexican-American cop who suspects the truth. Alice Ramos is his alcoholic Anglo wife. Fern Cahan is his partner. Walter Pettijohn is his boss. This novel is an absorbing psychological study, told from the point of view of each of these people, each with a different set of priorities. Fascinating.

ROGUE IN SPACE (1957) Science fiction novel. Crag, Brown's typical protagonist transplanted into the future, has numerous adventures and does much drinking. This continues FB's examination of the paradoxes of morality and his obvious fear and mistrust of women. Just when I'd decided that I didn't much care for Brown's SF, I read this one and thoroughly enjoyed it.

HONEYMOON IN HELL (1958) Science fiction short stories

THE OFFICE (1958) Mainstream novel with minor crime elements. This is the Brown novel easiest to forget.

ONE FOR THE ROAD (1958) Mystery novel

THE LATE LAMENTED (1959) Ed & Am Hunter mystery novel

KNOCK THREE-ONE-TWO (1959) Mystery novel

THE MIND THING (1961) Paperback original science fiction novel

THE MURDERERS (1961) Mystery novel

NIGHTMARES AND GEEZENSTACKS (1961) Miscellaneous short stories. Probably Brown's most famous short story collection.

THE FIVE-DAY NIGHTMARE (1962) Mystery novel

MRS. MURPHY'S UNDERPANTS (1963) Ed & Am Hunter mystery novel

THE SHAGGY DOG AND OTHER MURDERS (1963) Mystery short stories

DAYMARES (1968) Science fiction short stories

PARADOX LOST AND TWELVE OTHER GREAT SCIENCE FICTION TALES (1973) His better SF stories are here.

HOMICIDE SANITARIUM (1984) Mystery short stories

BEFORE SHE KILLS (1984) Mystery short stories

CARNIVAL OF CRIME (1985) Mystery short stories. Beautiful volume of Brown's mystery stories. Also includes short biography and comprehensive bibliography.

You have to remember that PSYCHO is a film made with quite a sense of amusement on my part. To me, it's a fun picture.

--Alfred Hitchcock

THE DARK FANTASTIC

by Stanley Ellin
(1983)

commentary by Jerry Shifrin & Charles Power

Jerry Shifrin:

I just finished Stanley Ellin's THE DARK FANTASTIC, an excellent, gripping thriller. It's told from two different viewpoints using an alternating chapters technique. What I found most fascinating about this was the unpleasantness of the hero and the semi- attractiveness of the villain. I just wonder if that's what the author intended?

The story concerns an old-time resident of Brooklyn, NY who's dying of cancer. He's a retired university professor who's almost penniless and apparently dependent on painkiller medication. In his university days he was a staunch supporter of minorities. Now, perhaps due to the drugs, he appears as an extreme racist and has decided to blow up an apartment building he owns which is peopled by blacks and other minorities. The "hero", a detective on the trail of an art thief, has the hots for the daughter of one of the tenants of that building. Needless to say the book is mainly about the intertwining of their respective goals.

Charles Power:

Glad you were able to enjoy THE DARK FANTASTIC at last. I think it was the first major original novel published by Mysterious Press--due to the fact that Ellin's regular publisher wanted nothing to do with it! That oh-so-charming racist villain was a bit too much for them.

By the way, I didn't think the detective hero was as unpleasant as you imply. He was, incidentally, Ellin's only recurring character, having appeared in one previous, shorter (and less interesting) novel, STAR LIGHT, STAR BRIGHT.

Ellin is GREAT. See if you can find THE KEY TO NICHOLAS STREET and THE LUXEMBOURG RUN. And, if possible, the omnibus volume of his short fiction, also from Mysterious Press, THE SPECIALTY OF THE HOUSE.

Jerry Shifrin:

Funny. I wrestled with my feelings towards Kirwan (the villain) and ultimately concluded that he really was an okay guy, but the painkiller medication had made him psychotic. The evidence showed that he was a supporter of minorities during his professorial career.

Maybe it's just me. I puzzled over what Ellin's intent may have been for Milano (the detective). Is that what Ellin saw as an attractive character? Was Ellin really pandering to that type of character who he may have perceived as his primary audience? My guess is that he was there as a contrast to Kirwan, a good guy gone bad.

Milano appeared to me as a real user/abuser of people, particularly women. He even used his (unknown to her) ex-lover to get information to help the girl he was trying to bed. He used his neighbor's influence to draw her towards his bachelor pad. He used (and later ignored) the two kids at his agency, even though he indicated that he'd help them later (I presume that it was one of those kids who was responsible for warning Kirwan). In addition, he was presented as something less than brilliant, consistently missing or misunderstanding the various clues until they were thrown in his face.

I think Ellin took some pains to show all of his character flaws. Perhaps it was an anti-hero approach.

Charles Power:

It's been a while since I read THE DARK FANTASTIC, but at the time, I interpreted Kirwan's prior "liberal" history as completely shallow and hypocritical. Kirwan was consistently shown as a manipulative scoundrel.

Jerry Shifrin:

I agree that that interpretation is possible, but will point to his long career of being a good guy and the fact that his nastiness only began after abusing his painkiller medication (recall that he was bribing the pharmacist for additional supplies). Perhaps Ellin intended for it to be ambiguous, but I believe Kirwan's form of paranoia/psychosis is not untypical for drug abusers.

Milano, on the other hand, had no such excuse for his behavior.

We have a putative hero who successfully solves a mystery, saving a number of lives in the process, and winning the affection of a beautiful woman. We also have a bitter old man who dies while attempting to murder a number of innocent people. This would be a good, though somewhat ordinary, story. It's the closer examination of the two protagonists that raises all of the ambiguities.

I give the book extra credit for being thought-provoking. Our discussion on this is somewhat similar to my own thinking and evaluation subsequent to finishing the story. I think it's that sort of intricacy/ambiguity that makes a good book into an excellent one. It's really a shame that this book didn't get a wider audience.

A good film is that which absorbs the audience's attention and enables them to come out of the theater and say, "The dinner, the baby-sitter, the price of admission -- that was all worth it."

--Alfred Hitchcock

GUEST REVIEWER: Darryl Kenning

THESE GREEN FOREIGN HILLS,
by Roland J. Green
(ACE 12-87, $2.95)

This is book #2 in a combat SF series called "The Peace Company". [Which incidentally was the name of the first novel of the series.] The author has done a number of successful collaborations with some of my favorite authors (Pournelle, Dickson, Carr), and this book (and the first) lived up to my expectations.

Roland Green spends more time examining the interpersonal relationships that make any group of people effective than he does in the actual "action". It is a pleasure to see an author show the use of informal networks in a generally positive light for a change. For me at least, that part of the story construction was as fascinating as it was well done. I don't want to shortchange the story itself though. It moves well along and is gradually building up a comprehensive picture of life in his particular universe at that particular time.

After reading this book I immediately went back and reread the first of the series -- I enjoyed it too. This one rates a spot in the "I'll come back and reread it" stack. Enjoy.

Rating: 4 (out of a possible 5)

SIDESHOW

by W. R. Thompson
(Baen 1-88, $3.50)

About the year 2000, if history is any indicator, we can expect a multitude of doomsayers, end of the worldists, and a round of good ole' crazies to appear. SIDESHOW has all these elements and more, it is reminiscent of SLAN by A.E. Van Vogt with its psi characters, yet manages to be an excellent projection of a possible near future in America.

From a political analyst's viewpoint, the scenario is depressingly realistic and all too possible -- splintered one issue political parties -- suspension of some civil liberties -- broad liberties taken with other human rights -- deep endemic financial depression -- all combining to set the stage as a new wild psi talent starts to show up in the general population.

I found the story well thought out, with nice character depth and an even pace. No great surprises in the story line, but in spite of the depressing political environment I really enjoyed the book. As a matter of fact I had a very hard time putting it down once I had started it!

In short, even if you aren't into political environment forecasting, I recommend this book for your enjoyment.

Rating: 4 (on our 1-5 scale)

Darryl Kenning may be reached at the ANNEX BBS 513-433-0821 or, at 6331 Marshall Rd. Centerville, OH 45459.

(These reviews first appeared in STARWARD BOUND, a publication of the Dayton Area Science Fiction Club, and are reprinted by permission of the author.)

(c) copyright 1988 by Darryl Kenning

I used to envy Walt Disney when he made only cartoons. If he didn't like an actor, he could tear him up.

--Alfred Hitchcock

AUGUST BIRTHDAYS

01 1819 Herman Melville, American writer
02 1924 James Baldwin, American writer
03 1887 Rupert Brooke, English poet
03 1920 P.D. James, English novelist
03 1924 Leon Uris, American novelist
04 1792 Percy Bysshe Shelley, English poet
04 1839 Walter Pater, English writer
04 1859 Knut Hamsun, Norwegian writer
05 1850 Guy de Maupassant, French writer
05 1889 Conrad Aiken, American writer
06 1651 Francois Fenelon, French writer
06 1809 Alfred, Lord Tennyson, English poet
06 1868 Paul Claudel, French writer
08 1884 Sara Teasdale, American poet
08 1896 Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings, American writer
09 1593 Izaak Walton, English writer
09 1631 John Dryden, English writer
09 1922 Philip Larkin, English writer
10 1869 Lawrence Binyon, English writer
11 1823 Charlotte M. Yonge, English writer
11 1892 Hugh MacDiarmid, Scottish writer
11 1897 Louise Bogan, American writer
11 1913 Sir Angus Wilson, English writer
12 1774 Robert Southey, English poet
12 1867 Edith Hamilton, American writer
12 1876 Mary Roberts Rinehart, American writer
12 1884 Frank Swinnerton, English novelist
13 1802 Nikolaus Lenau, Austrian poet
14 1846 Henry David Thoreau jailed for tax resistance
14 1867 John Galsworthy, English writer
15 1771 Sir Walter Scott, Scottish writer
15 1785 Thomas De Quincey, English writer
15 1887 Edna Ferber, American writer
16 1860 Jules Laforgue, French poet
16 1888 T.E. Lawrence, English writer
16 1902 Georgette Heyer, English novelist
17 1840 Wilfrid Scawen Blunt, English writer
17 1932 V.S. Naipaul, Trinidadian novelist
18 1916 Elsa Morante, Italian writer
18 1922 Alain Robbe-Grillet, French writer
19 1902 Ogden Nash, American poet
19 1903 James Gould Cozzens, American novelist
20 1881 Edgar A. Guest, American journalist and poet
20 1901 Salvatore Quasimodo, Italian writer
20 1921 Jacqueline Susann, American novelist
22 1893 Dorothy Parker, American writer
22 1903 Ren Wellek, Austrian writer
22 1920 Ray Bradbury, American writer
23 1868 Edgar Lee Masters, American writer
23 1908 Arthur Adamov, Russian dramatist
24 1591 Robert Herrick, English poet
24 1872 Sir Max Beerbohm, English writer
24 1894 Jean Rhys, English writer
24 1899 Jorge Luis Borges, Argentinian writer
25 1836 Bret Harte, American writer
25 1921 Brian Moore, Irish novelist
26 1875 Sir John Buchan, Scottish writer
26 1880 Guillaume Apollinaire, French writer
26 1904 Christopher Isherwood, English writer
26 1914 Julio Cortazar, Argentinian writer
27 1770 Georg Wilhelm Hegel, German philosopher
27 1871 Theodore Dreiser, American writer
27 1899 C.S. Forester, English novelist
28 1749 Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, German writer
28 1903 Bruno Bettelheim, American writer
29 1632 John Locke, English philosopher
29 1809 Oliver Wendell Holmes, American writer
30 1797 Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley, English novelist
30 1901 John Gunther, American writer
31 1811 Thophile Gautier, French writer
31 1908 William Saroyan, American writer

It has been said of me that if I made CINDERELLA, the audience would start looking for a body in the pumpkin coach.

--Alfred Hitchcock

NUMBER ONE FAN

by Annie Wilkes

The important thing to remember is to keep moving. Sure, you enjoy Stephen King, but you need more. The longer your list of favored authors and/or books is, the better off you'll be, so don't allow yourself to get bogged down.

You see, there's such a rainbow of reading out there. There are mystery stories, and science fiction stories, and westerns, and Vietnam stories, and dog stories, and vampire stories, and had-I-but-known stories, and funny stories, and adultery stories, and pink elephant stories, and....well, you get the idea. So why limit yourself? Like your parents used to say about spinach: how do you know you don't like it if you've never tried it? Try everything at least once. Then try it at least once again, much later, because even if the book doesn't change, you do.

The real problem is those snobbish gourmets. They'd have you believe that enjoying lots of different things just shows how uncultured you are. Pfui! Look at the poor wine connoisseur who will tell you that all those wines in your local wine shop are "simply undrinkable". They, with their sophisticated palate, would only drink this wine made by one old man, in alternate years, in the south of France. Of course, he won't ship so you have to go there personally, on a donkey over dirt trails, but THAT'S wine. How sad. All that knowledge, and it hasn't gotten him anywhere at all.

So, as I said before, keep moving. Next time you're picking books out, get something different. Ask someone for a recommendation if you want to, but EXPLORE! Blaze a new trail for yourself. The very best book you'll have read in 1989 may be one you've never heard of yet.

TRIVIA ANSWERS

Part One:

1. Anne Tyler
2. Irving Stone
3. Erich Maria Remarque
4. Robert Penn Warren
5. Jules Verne
6. Lew Wallace
7. Philip K. Dick (DO ANDROIDS DREAM OF ELECTRIC SHEEP?)
8. Pierre Boulle
9. John O'Hara
10. Herman Wouk
11. Harold Robbins
12. Alice Walker
13. Boris Pasternak
14. John Steinbeck
15. Leon Uris
16. William Peter Blatty
17. Ray Bradbury
18. Mary Shelley
19. James Jones
20. Edna Ferber
21. Mario Puzo
22. Margaret Mitchell
23. Victor Hugo
24. James Hilton
25. Erich Segal
26. Dashiell Hammett
27. Charles Nordhoff
28. William Somerset Maugham
29. Ken Kesey
30. Henryk Sienkiewicz
31. Lloyd C. Douglas
32. Ira Levin
33. William Styron
34. Michael Crichton
35. Henry Fielding
36. Leo Tolstoy
37. Emily Bronte

Part Two:

1. They had some form of rabies.
2. Those were the original working titles of Steven Spielberg's (executive producer of GREMLINS) E.T. and CLOSE ENCOUNTERS, respectively.
3. Those are the names of Dustin Hoffman's in-laws.
4. THX-1138 is the title of director George Lucas's first feature film.
5. It's a snide reference to film critics Roger Ebert and Gene Siskel.
6. His doctor was the jogger who died on the beach.
7. As a contestant on the TV game show JEOPARDY.
8. Michael Douglas
9. Humphrey Bogart never said "Play it again, Sam".
10. Peter Finch, for NETWORK (Best Actor)

They tell me that a murder is committed every minute, so I don't want to waste any more of your time. I know you want to get to work.

--Alfred Hitchcock