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BAH Issue 13

eZine's profile picture
Published in 
BAH
 · 25 Apr 2019

  

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BAH - Issue #013
ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿
³ Title: the unfortunate story of wednesday morning. Author: Murmur³
³ Date: 06-10-95 ³
³ *BAH* ³
ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ

All text included in BAH issues is for educational purposes only. In no
way do we at BAH endorse whatever actions described in our text files. If
you're convinced the weirdness of BAH rivals David Letterman, don't come
crying to us.
[BAH]

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the unfortunate story of monday morning. no, wednesday morning.

i woke up fresh from at least an hourlong dream featuring myself
and a mongoose in the backyard i grew up in; the mongoose just sort of
walked around, for no explainable reason. but that's OK. i went to
"work" which is my work-study position at our college cafeteria, went to
fill one of the cereal keepers with some kellogg's product, and lo and
behold, here's no less than five pepper mills full of black pepper. the
whole damn thing smelled like black pepper. i was really losing it, i
thought i might black out. then, the skim milk and the 2% milk run out
at the same time. i go get fresh milk, go to put the milk thingies in
the milk container, then somebody bitches that the orange juice has run
out. then the apple juice. four of the six main beverages. all ran
out at once. so i have like 20 people waiting for me to replace, in
order, the skim milk, the 2% milk, the orange juice, the apple juice.
while replacing the last two, i notice a cockroach. i go ask the main
guy what i should do with it, he tells me i should go throw it away. so,
i did. then i go to stack glasses up and notice how almost everyone will
take at least two glasses, one of milk, one of juice, and half of them
won't finish one or the other or both. i nearly start slugging people.
then suddenly there's this ladder outside a window. it looked like two
feet on the top of it but they weren't feet. soon there was a window
washer, washing a window that wasn't really dirty in the first place. i
pretty much was done at this point so that's about when i left and then i
forget what i did, for the most part. but it was all pretty scary.

murmur

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